Clutch my hands and don’t let go,

Feel my breath and make me glow

Push my hair behind my ear,

And let me know, are we the perfect pair?

I see a world through your hazel eyes

Do tell me, is it paradise?

Looking at you, my heart feel light,

As you wrap me up in this hug so tight.

You make me blush, you make me warm,

As you touch my face with your tender palm.

I just can’t say how I feel right now,

So is this what they call as love?

Buried in your tight embrace,

Is really when I solace

The world is nothing when I have you,

And the whole of me is just for you.

Oh look, the stars are smiling,

And look, the trees are dancing!

Come let’s flee to the land of love

Under the sea to the land of love.

this is a story of love, heartbreak, and everything in between. i can remember his face but his voice fades everyday- i’m sure i can tell our story as i recall it.

I remember the days

Way back when

I’ll take you back too

Back to when school began

When we were stereotypes

The basket case and the troubled kid

When we were innocent

Before the trouble began

You hated your mom

And I was a no one

You were a lost kid without a family

I was a girl who begged to be loved

Let’s travel to when we first met

Back to the loud halls of school

I saw you and couldn’t look away

I had fallen in love like a fool

When we first spoke, way back before the labels stuck

I was astounded by your soul

The way your blue eyes fell on me

And made me feel like I was gold

Your smile roped me in

With you, I’d gladly grow gray and old

“Be careful, he’s a hellraiser,” I was told

But I didn’t quite care

No one knew a high

Akin to being in your hold

I remember how your face fell as you told me your pain

Tears danced over the blunt you rolled

I hold a picture of you to my chest

The apartment we shared now feels cold

You found love elsewhere

And now I sleep in our bed alone

Take me back to our graduation

The way you smiled and tossed your cap proudly

Take me back to our first frat party

When you bloodied a boy who spilled his drink on me

When you held me up over the toilet bowl crying

Unaware of how hard it was for you to see

I'm tearing up now at all of the memories

First kiss, first trip, first everything

These days when I close my eyes

Your gray skin is all I can see

Take me back to the unavoidable chaos

Brought on by soulmates finding each other too early

When you had girls coming in and out of your room

When I puked and cried drunkenly, alone, without you

When I kissed a boy and you smashed a plate

Then apologized for scaring me

Deciding to make it up to me

In a way that wasn't so PG-13

Soon the girls stopped coming

Because you stopped letting them in

Spending your mornings gazing at my sleeping form

Kissing my forehead while I rested on your rising chest

Take me back to the days you'd carry me home from the bar

Drive home with me clinging to your body

When you blared music and we sang along

When you passed out behind the wheel and crashed our car

Take me back to when things were bad again

When you slept with another girl in our bed

When you said you hated titles

When you came home less and less

When you had lipstick stains on your neck

When our relationship was hanging by a thread

Bring me back to when you said you hated me

And drove your fist into the wall beside my head

When you chased me out of the flat

Into the dark, dangerous night I went

Take me back to when you couldn't stop blaming yourself

For the man who had slipped something in my drink

When you brought me to the hospital and never visited

Because you said you needed time to think

Take me back to our final kiss

That happened just six months ago

When I could taste your tears

Running between our lips

When you said goodbye and faded away

When my memory of you left with just a few sips

Now I can't remember how many bottles I've had

But the feeling of your love has died

You're just another one who left me in the dust

You were my hardest goodbye.

aZJJicosneuhfomnaiss yuo

........................

It's been ten years

I hope I never forget the days way back when

When we were stereotypes

The basket case and the troubled kid

When we were innocent

Before the trouble began

I hope I remember the love we shared

The tears, the kisses, and the romance

Because ten years ago

I watched your Rosewood box go into the ground.

From time to time, I still recall graduation day

The way you smiled and threw your cap

Or when you saved me at our first frat party

Or the chaos and puking and all of the drinks

...That never happened

Because you killed yourself at thirteen

Before you smashed plates and before you could chase me out

You died a troubled kid

And left your basket case all alone

At fourteen, I watched them bury you twenty years ago

And replay the moment of when we met

Every night before I sleep.

The end.

Isn’t it nice being all alone? No noise? But as they sat and cried in their room, they suddenly realized why people liked love so much. Why, even after a broken heart so many times, you come back, and try again. Love gives them so many things. A shoulder to cry on, someone to wipe your tears, Someone to give your demons to, and someone who no matter what is happening, will not abandon you. They too wished they had someone to love, and care for. Someone to fight for, and live for. Someone to die for, and all they ever asked, was a reason to live on Earth. A reason, why they shouldn’t turn out the light. But here alone in the darkness, any love was out of sight. “Human typo. The world has enough failures, they don’t need another like you!” As their demons whisper. There is no one to take the pain away. “Better off dead!” They say. But As the user “athenaknowz” has said before in one of their posts, “The world only knows how to hate, destroy, break, and kill.” And that’s why we can’t ever give in and let them win...right?

Somehow, mountains made their way

Into our conversation. I remembered I’d seen

A tattoo on the arm of someone lovely

A sketched-out outline of three peaks.

Turning the space of his arm

Into the sky and earth and the in-between.

I told you in the name of beauty

Wasn’t that beautiful? I said.

You heard and agreed, in the light of

That slightly dim café, with its shawls and cushions

And carpets and beads. They made

Your eyes shine a little brighter than usual.

I was never quite sure what landscape you’d be

I thought of a garden by the beach

With the kind of breeze everyone

Dreams of on hot summer days

Or maybe a clouded sea.

It was difficult not to notice

How the curve of your waist tucked into the belt

Of your one-size-too-large corduroys.

And how beautiful your hands were,

Hands I watched flutter when you talked

About everything you’d make and create.

Perhaps, —yes, I was envious

Of every surface they’d touch

But mostly I could barely contain

My amazement that someone like you

Existed in the same place as someone like me

For weeks—months—afterwards

I thought of you in that coffee shop

I tried hard not to wonder

The shape your chest must make

When your spine curved

And what it would be like to see

Your frilly white blouse

Rise and fall to the floor.

i've fallen

into it

over and over

mixed signals

tears

confusion

departures

that left

holes

in my

soul

like a

moth-eaten

sweater

it

killed

me

i

despised

it

bitter

because

of this

emotion

that had

hurt

every

time

your smile changed all that

Roses are red

Violets are blue

There’s no one as disgusting

or as repulsive as you

Your lips are like earthworms

Your eyes are like mud

Like a bomb unexploded

You sure are a dud

Your arms are all gangly

Your looks undefined

The person that falls for you

sure must be blind

I best I can do

It’s all I can say

The only way I could love you

is from far far away

Love.

How muddled that word can get

in the head

of a confused

young

flustered

giggly

high school girl.

How coalesced it can get with

"crush"

"like"

"infatuation".

How one moment

I could be

head

over

heels.

And the next-

realize that these feelings

will be fleeting.

And yet

I still wonder if it's love.

But

it's not.

And it's never been.

At least

not yet.

Dear Love,

Please send me:

a cat lover

short is good

some nice padding

tanned or darker

patience is a virtue

as is cooking, too

my mom's kinda overbearing

so hopefully they get along

and ooh - curly hair is cute

a reader is a must

someone who likes to listen

and puts up with indecision

maybe someone who enjoys cardio

so we could workout together

and has a big family

like the kind that cooks a lot (emphasis on cooking!)

but doesn't want kids necessarily

but gets along with kids of course

and has a gentle spirit

that's happy to laze about with me

...........

Oh.

...........

Well, huh.

This works too.

I repeat the word over and over to inspire myself: love.

I think of townhouses in a cold city where men

were absent though we were both present.

I think of the men who wrote my fate under their

soft gaze, who didn't wait with me for my cab home.

I think of hotel rooms and bitter remarks, fake laughter

and my dorm room rug, purchased though it was white

and could turn grey with stains. There was the man who

said my aura was orange, who made our relationship

a maze, intentionally losing me. Calling my father at

midnight, before I moved to Pacific Coast Time and

couldn't call him at all hours of the night. I think of my

sister, how she found love after years of sink holes and

dead ends. There are so many things that tie us back to our

initial demise. And yet, here in the dead of night, before

sunrise, there are songs that can change my brain chemistry

and make me fly. In the summer of my junior year of college,

I listened to the lightning that lit up her eyes and drank soda

because I couldn't yet stomach alcohol. I think of broken

homes, relationships in tatters after long nights of zero

attraction. After all of the crying, after I hated all of the

LA women for their luck in unflawed genes and ripped jeans,

I moved to that same state, for a man, so we could share the same

time zone. There is no amount of love that can save this poem,

and I realize that now, many words deep, many attempts

later at stabbing into the darkness, I am still that girl.

I will always be the girl who loved and lost, self-fulfilled,

bitterly writing poems that don't attract anything but flies.

Just like talent writes itself, my fate is written from up above.