Stand By Me
Take the beans off the stove! A chuckle shared between friends.
After school we rode until our bodies ached and explored the same old places just to find something new.
Starlight giving birth to dreams, curiosity shared like food and wine.
The bond is tight, holding me together.
Constant jokes and prodding questions.
Jealousy of love feminine, and needy newcomers.
Fights born from silence.
The bond loosens, pushing me away.
A home shared, rooms close enough to hear - rooms close enough to cry.
People in need coming for help, their presence widens the divide.
Betrayal comes followed by the familiar ghost leaving my soul unanswered.
The bond broken, forever gone.
"Hey, haven't heard from you since we left, it's been about a week now. You coming by to help? It's the last day, and you forgot a few things in your room. Anyway, I'll see you when you get here."
A candy-colored clown they call the sandman...
A book with a thousand bloodlines and riddled with forgotten context.
Stories of beasts fantastic with feats superhuman.
A thirty-eight inch strip of leather.
Fetid bottle of something to make it all go away - for a time.
Mysterious gifts from familiar faces.
A flag bound to heroes who will never see home.
Lofty titles placed to make us feel safe.
Order from experience that was never right to begin with.
A view blocked from something bad and a lesson taken out of fear.
Questions from souls more lost than others.
Reason wrung from countless fabrications.
Does it draw a smile still?
The pulling void, the place that companionship plugs is back, and it's okay.
It was in their leaving that comfort came, I know this now as I look back.
I couldn't see it before, even if I had wanted too.
I took for granted and dipped greedily, yet gave as much as I got.
His laugh, longing eyes and trusting ears are gone now.
A part of me knew he wasn't coming back.
I Don’t Think He’s Coming Back
Old blue carpet, cleaned a thousand times too many.
Toys in their containers, mismatched but well loved.
A bunk bed for one, because up is the only place left to go.
A rocket ship in a painting, a reminder of fear overcome.
The flimsy half wood door slams, this time for good.
Sometimes, it is in the going where we find our true selves.
She was alone, and I thought she could use some company. Just a laugh or two, anything to make that forlorn aura dissipate.
Talks turned to walks, and walks into dates. I wore myself on my sleeves, and rolled them up while I pried into her most hated forms. She wasn’t so bad, not to me.
Time flew as I poured myself into her, our eyes locked, souls bared wide.
Or so I thought.
No, for she looked beyond, to a place where I no longer existed. A place where strife was an old friend, and lonliness preferable company.
Perhaps she wasn’t ready yet, or maybe she was - just not for me.
It's your old friend here, reaching you the only way I can, but you know that. Who else still writes letters though? For that matter, who else even thinks of anyone anymore unless they need something...
There I go again, about to ramble on about things I don't know much about, and how could I? I was never around anyway. Still, it's my favorite thing.
I suppose it's the wondering, guessing, and most of all, hope of being wrong. It is for that reason I'm writing in the first place. For once, I wanted to be wrong.
Then it all came out, and what? Broken, gone? Well, yes. That's the way of things between us.
We all know that once you show up, it won't be long before I'm there as well.
Dead branches of selfishness.
Oil of secrecy.
Rope and twine of the finest shame.
Bound am I by the trappings of jaded society.
When I was patient, nothing came. Do I not deserve pleasure - even a morsel of what I percieve others to have in their finest kodak moments?
Perhaps I do not, for it has been so long... and I no longer know what is right. I no longer know what I am, or who I wanted to be.
So bring now the fire, so that I do not have to see her cry.
The Big Sad
Shall I make them laugh, then?
"I said, I AM HUNGRY!"
Alright... I'll start with a smile, that always reels them in. I'll ask them about their day, then tell them it will get worse and not to worry. I'll keep the smile so they know. They will laugh, they always do. They don't expect it. They open up for however short, and tell me about their day. I jest at their expense, or mine. Usually mine, for it is no great loss.
"Choice! Alas, it was just a taste. MORE! So dull, all of this! More Laughter!"
"None for you, though," he whispers in my ear, voice dripping with venom. "It will not reach you. It will never reach you, for I am so... so famished."
His grin permeates my being, and I know he is right. Sometimes I wonder who I am without him?