

path
fingers starved for the night.
softly, go down the path
towards the forest. and forget.
tap out your meaning,
breathe the blood of the trees.
twist the air into your lungs
and back out again.
slow, the sky shifts.
solitary pines, whispering needles.
what life lives beyond--
you have no comprehension.
it's a lonely walk, long.
splitting shadows as you go,
threading the wind through
and around your wrists.
holding on.
tonight it's yours. swap songs
with the birds, choke the life
out of them, let them turn to mist.
you are you are air and song.
nature is death and all death is nature.
hold. it is behind you, always has been.
you're not alone. gently, let go.
it is ancient, it does not know
how to be kind. quietly.
you are you are mist and soil.
sink through roots, older than
your species. older than
insects and dirt and sunlight.
threads of life. threads of universe.
woven roots to hold you.
softly, go down the path
towards the forest. and forget.
in space that thoughts reside
it's not special, she knows, to think there's something special about the moon. she looks up, looks in, swims with the star motes in the moon's beam.
in this tunnel of light there is privacy. secrecy, even. though they all share the same moon, she believes this space is sacred, undisturbed, and individual. her words, filtered but unfiltered, may float. may exist. may take up space that does not intrude, interfere, or permeate. thoughts may appear. thoughts may pass.
hold on, because the time isn’t right
rhythmically,
we fall apart.
- - -
silent spins through this place we call Universe:
she is infinite, she is gentle. until she is not.
- - -
ten fingers,
immeasurable choices.
just enough teeth to gnaw through
the string that tethers us together, sometimes.
- - -
peaks of houses unknown,
peeking through tinted windows.
we slide like ghosts across this earth.
- - -
when time thins to molecular randomness:
whose choice is it, whose push and pull?
swimming within fate's design.
neither Hers, nor mine.
we just must learn to hold on.
- - -
just the gentle shake of the roaring thunder:
these are
overcast skies &
i've been too
tired to open
the blinds for a while,
let the air in
maybe if we
suffocate together
we can call it romantic.
instead of pathetic
tripping over yourself
to close your eyes,
using his voice like a lifeline,
hedge maze after hedge maze
the phone line still rings
somewhere,
aren't you dying
to pick it up,
aren't you dying,
you wouldn't be here if
we all weren't slowly dying
this is comfort after all:
throw up the words again,
hate yourself, hate him,
hate yourself more.
it's a virus, you're the virus,
this is comfort, this is void.
you decided to be here.
you decide to stay.
over & over again
near the heart it ends
you think its the flowers
you think its the songs
you fall in love too much
without any daydreams
always the calculation
never the mathematician
swimming through holes
built under ground
rock spires and sudden winds
forgotten realms and other things
we swore fealty
we fell on our swords
its over over over
near the heart it swells
focus the energy
play the fool
sing to the treetops
write silence until the palms
of your hands bleed out
youre never never never
running away from the things
that you know
buried deep in your throat
every time you suck in a new breath
toil under the sun moon gods
wring your hands of sin
beg for another day of this
sink your feet in
wish for better
never over over over
near the heart it ends
cycle
corset
sun breeze
quick sex
car drive
another week
paranoia
message
skip work
self checkout
solo
linoleum
one pink line
sigh
sign
cheat fate
didn't want it
hurt
didn't want it
"gambit"
paranoia
charred heart
sob
parallel
didn't want it
impossible
possible
choice?
tears
intersect
didn't happen
deserved
imagination
ghost regret
status
life
work
sex
trembling heart
still
status quo
chicago
- you watch because she's beautiful; bangs and black boots and she's by herself, like you'd rather be
- model ship watches from above a cooler of beer, reeks of incense, floor slippery with dirty mop water
- laughing from behind you, subway, underground, arched ceiling brick beautiful but no one seems to notice when they see it all the time
- empty mall, clean space sterile; silent footsteps like where am i
- towering window walls, stories after stories after stories above you
- he asks for money, we walk, he asks for money, raises one hand to the dark sky and speaks of god's lines on his palms
- fuzzy star jacket, cheetah print converse, black glasses; stranger
- round overlook, a little boy waves from the window and you didn't wave back
- sticky seat in the corner of the bar, not here (or there) enough
- early light on the empty passenger seat, she watches from the backyard of a stranger's house
- mispainted walls inside an unknown place, light from a box, icing on your fingers
- leg bouncing like a scream underneath restaurant table as the conversation spins round and round and round you
- twos and twos and twos, even and still you're left behind (odd)
- roots growing around the edges of the bus stop sign, wind battering your sides, traffic left right; left
- teeth chattering despite the sticky sweat on your back, not cold just uncontrolled
- lake blues greens sky waters beauty: flash by too quick
- white sheets no color in the dark, just silent cold tears
Without
You know we were somewhere
You know the city smells like fire
And the streets here shine golden in the sun
But without
When I'm without
When I'm left with a head half open
To catch the extra rain
It's like icy water
And I'm falling backwards
Into the river
There are tears on my skin
There are tears on my skin
Metal handles, windy hair
Knuckles worn from holding the clouds
Windows and rows of teeth
Glimmering across the water
But without
Dog in a cage
Dying flower
Light behind our eyes
Without without without
Reason
There are tears