I was hit with a wave of anxiety
with just the anticipation of seeing you again.
I just hate the idea of seeing your face
knowing everything you did.
And somehow you have the audacity to hate me
and my entire family?
This weekend is going to be difficult
but I will make it through
because despite everything,
I am stronger than my fear of you.
Feeling Blah
I think one of the worst feelings
is not being wanted or needed.
I have felt all of this this week
and I just feel like the energy inside of me is slowly burning away.
I don't want to doubt my abilities
or feel like I can't conquer whatever obstacle is in front of me
but to have a week full of words like,
"Why do I have to be here with you"
or
"I don't want to talk to you"
or
"Hey, we don't need you here any longer"
just has completely sucked the air from my lungs
and I just feel like I'm crawling to get to the finish line.
No Follow Throu...
I really struggle
to finish the stories that I start.
I have great ideas, but I have no idea how to get there
and then I get caught up in other things
and the ideas begin to slowly slip my mind until they're gone
and I'm left with a page
with no direction whatsoever.
I just want to finish what I start
and figure out where I am going.
I want people to help me plan
and tell me if my idea is really good
or if I'm just kidding myself.
I hope to one day finish a story,
and even if no one reads it
at least I completed my dream.
I know I don't have the right
to say I'm scared right now.
Especially when I'm not in a position to have my whole world be turned upside down
compared to others.
I want to be able to help
but I have no idea how.
I don't know what to do
or where to go
to help others throughout the world
or those within my community.
Where do you even start
when you feel a revolution on the horizon?