Beams of light danced along my bed. As I began to open my eyes my head instantly started to throb. I slowly began to sit up and take a sit of water from the small glass cup sitting on my nightstand. After abruptly learning it was mezcal I then began to try and depict what happened to me. Unfortunately though it was as if my memory had been wiped clean, for I had no recollection of what had played out the night before. Where even was I? All I heard was soft murmurs of Spanish jazz playing in the background. I finally mustered up the energy to stand up and explore the hotel I was staying at in hopes of understanding where I was. Yet, if I had known of the events to come, I may have allowed myself time to sit in this bed a while longer. As I opened the door from the bedroom I was quickly in dismay at what I saw next. My actions from drinking too much mezcal had costed me the misery and despair of a whole lifetime.

The intimate moments that I get to share with the universe, give my heart meaning. The way my blood flows through my veins at a very rapid pace, as I watch the waves in the violent ocean crash against the rocks, or the way my stomach fills with butterflies as I admire the creeping of the bright orange sun fill the morning sky and say good morning to the world beneath it, or even the pure white snowflakes that fall from the sky like little delicate angels. I am fulfilled by the precious universe, so much so that if I never found love in a individual again, I may just live.

We once shared a great love, a love that sparked all the joy my heart had to offer, until it became empty.

We once made love to eachother with such passion that my body had nothing more to offer afterwards.

We once fought using such words, that left my tender heart, aching.

We once lived, until we didn’t.

I once allowed myself to fall into the vulnerability of your love, for a second time.