The Great Badalamenti!
“Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic” — Arthur C. Clarke
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"And now for my final trick," the Great Badalamenti, boasted, "I'll make someone in the audience disappear."
The applause was anemic. He was the fifth magician of the night, so the crowd were visibly tired, yawning and fidgeting.
"A volunteer, anyone?" He looked around his audience. "How 'bout you, sir? Yes, you, with the Rolex. And that beautiful wife. Right, wife?"
A well-dressed middle-aged man nodded--about his wife--and then pointed to himself.
"Yes, you! Come on up."
A smattering of applause began. The man kissed his stunning wife at their table and rose, albeit tentatively. His wife seemed irked by the show of affection, of which the Great Badalamenti took notice and great interest.
Once the man had joined him onstage, the audience applause grew.
"And you are?"
"Roderick," the man answered.
More applause.
The Great Badalamenti then removed from his mouth what must have been over a hundred colored handkerchiefs tied together in one long string. When he shook out the heap of cloth, it billowed into a multicolored, large single sheet.
More applause.
The Great Badalamenti threw the sheet over Roderick.
"Roderick?" the Great Badlamenti asked.
"Yes?" he answered from under the sheet.
"Have we ever met before?" he asked.
"No," answered Roderick, although his beautiful wife knew better.
"OK, when I count to three, I want you to fixate on Hell."
"Hell?"
"Yes, Hell." Then to the audience, "It makes for dramatic notoriety." The audience laughed. Back to Roderick, "Got it? Hell?"
"Yes," Roderick answered, "Hell, firmly in my mind."
"Great. Now when I tap your head, that's where you're going. Don't worry, you'll just be visiting." The audience laughed.
The Great Badalamenti tapped Roderick on the head. The sheet collapsed to the ground--quite empty.
The audience gasped, then applauded wildly. The magician took a bow, the lights went out, the music queued, and when the lights returned, the stage was empty.
It was a great show, but it wasn't a great trick; because it wasn't a trick.
The Great Badalamenti had a new girlfriend and wore his new Rolex.
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“Any sufficiently advanced evil is indistinguishable from magic.” — the Author