Rolf Crackblitz (blitzy to his 'friends') - a man haunted by the past. what hauts him he shall notvreveal, but his lost look as he drinks at the bar speaks for himself. you.can find two things at the bottom of a bottle- a worm, and the other one he can't remember.
Marius itchikawa (itchy) - a man overly fond of carry-on purses. he reads voraciously the obituaries, looking for opportunities.
Mehmet Tuscanini - a heir to a large fortune, he squanders money on frivolous activities like collecting autographs of gardeners and bribing bus drivers. some say he went to far at the community theater production of Indiana Jones.
Jarvis H. Jarvis - the greatest ukulele player that ever lived. made a name for himself in Finland. lost to the world during the spring thaw.
Hamlet S. Balcony - an avid popcorn collector. considered as an authority on the subject and often is asked to serve as an expert witness . secretly dreams about drawbridges but will keep his perversion hidden. if a scandal ever occurs, his career will never recover.
Sonny Listones- living paycheck to paycheck. deeply regretting his purchase of an air frier.
someday he'll learn the truth about ice golfing.
Constance D'evelroux the third- the fifth lady to be called Constance D'evelroux. likes to read lab supply catalogues . she was successful at casting her two predecessors into oblivion and shall one day become the first of her name. finds herself looking for mister right in all the wrong gas stations.
Mellisa perez - a regional administrator for a water dripper suppliers. desperately hopes to have her butterfly collection gain the respect it deserves. as the hours tick away, she impales moths and butterflies and dragonflies. a hurricanes seem to follow her, whereever she goes.
D'vasrsh Tzazziflaff - cheif navigator of a Varkian spice freighter. his phisical augmentation peohibit him from ever leaving his ship, yet in his dreams, he hopes for better things. in his free time he writes four-dimentional hikus.
count Elsrarfed, the Chterfarnian ambassador- quite capable of using his knife and fork and does not need a diaper anymore. his will as an honored guest must be obeyed, even if he needs more protein.
the carnivorous fern - a cognizant fern who sings and eats whatever it could catch. his fear of a dinosaur resurgence is ungrounded.