No. No, I can't win, I can't beat him. This is my thought process as I'm standing in the arena. I had a peircing sharp sword in one hand and my other was resting on the dagger in the sheath at my hip. I was fighting against Neptune, my true love. We were forced into the arena because in the village of Valon being in love with another man is forbidden. Jupiter and Neptune, a romance like no other that nobody in Valon could ever understand.
"Neptune, please. I can't hurt you." I say this loud enough that the hundreds of eyes watching us scream "boo". His sword is extended in the way he does when getting ready to kill. Neptune is a trained warrior, he knows how to fight and I've watched him as he trains, I know the way he fights and how to know when he's about to strike. And he's about to strike.
"I'm sorry, Jupiter. I have to, I have to live and defend Valon." I watched as tears stung his eyes. That reflected on me as I felt the warm tears run down my cheeks and dribble off my chin.
"I can't do this." I whisper. I drop my sword, listening to it clatter on the ground, another round of "boos" going around in the crowd. Neptunes eyes widen and I see his heart drop. He knows that now that I've dropped my sword he has to kill me. The tears come harder now, from both of us.
"I love you, Jupe." He says.
"I love you too." He walks towards me, dropping his sword as well.
"We're both going to walk out of here, I promise." Neptune says. He wraps is arms around me and I thrust my head into his shoulder, smelling his aroma of sweat and pine needles.
"Don't make promises you can't keep." I mutter into his ear. My dagger is in his chest before I can stop myself. He falls to the ground, his blood pooling around him. I get on my knees, moving my hands to his blood-soaked chest.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry! I didn't mean to, I'm sorry... please don't die, mi amor." My hands are already drenched in his blood and I know that it'll never truly come out. I'll always have the memory of killing the love of my life and his blood being on my hands.
"Thank you..." he breathes in a raspy voice. His last words.
I place my head onto his chest and sob, knowing blood will get in my nose and mouth but not caring. I will never forget today, the day I killed mi amor. I will never forget the day where the only option was to win.