Good God, I think She’s Right! They are Marigolds!
My all time favorite quote is from the 1969 film, “The Gay Deceivers” when Malcom proclaims in anguish after seeing his now known to be marigolds being stepped on, “I may not know my flowers, but I know a bitch when I see one!”
Little it seemed
I thought my parents weren’t good enough as others.I thought they should’ve work hard to make our lives better than now.I always complained about everything.
But today when I was talking with my mom I said to her that I was really thankful for everything they’ve done for me.
She smiled and said “I thought you’ll never said those words in my lifetime.”
Those words left a huge scar in my soul. No matter how much little it seemed, if someone did something for your happiness appreciate it. Sometimes just a one thank can change someone’s life.
You will never see, the scars inside of me.
The reflection of pain, that drives me insane.
A glimmer of hope, that disappears and floats.
You will never see, the scars that I see.
The window of closure, the point of exposure.
A gasp of relief, that hides underneath.
You will never see, the scars that are written on my skin.
The picture of a place, that showed me as erased.
A gift of emotions, that scar me with devotion.
You will never see the scars.
Life will never be the same
You can’t turn back and change it all
The scars from where you made me fall
I wish these things you could recall
My heart will never be the same
Somehow, I feel the guilt, and all the shame
I feel the pain each time it rains
Down to my knees, I’ve heard it all
Before this, I was so deep in love
Back then, I loved you, just because
I couldn’t see through all the fog
I should’ve saved me first of all
The time we spent chasing our tails
At night, I laid in bed and wailed
Not sure if I believed the tales
Wish I could’ve known so I could tell
You not to give into the game
Not to go down in burning flames
It was the years I could have saved
I could’ve saved us all the pain
Trying to find who you’re meant to be
Having to get back up on your feet
Having to fight the beast you beat
so, you could come running back to me
Trapped in a room with someone I can't stand,
They aim and rip at me.
In my mind.
On my body.
Words gnaw on my conscious,
like a lettuced goat.
Saliva dribbles pooling around my skull.
I can't think.
The bite is harsh.
Eyes spit tears.
They wrap their arms around me,
as breaths become more shallow.
My brain pounds on the sides of my head, trying to ooze out of my ears,
They promised my brain that one day it will escape.
They slice. They want out.
Blood scratches out my thighs; pain, and iron shocks me into reality.
"Fuck what did you do?" It's me, my heart settles.
Choked sobs crack in my throat.
I'm trapped in a room,
Face to Face (r/p)
Feathers bristle flesh and bone
Pierced with vanes like arrows
Bequeathing gifts, authored, unknown;
Manna feeds our marrow
Whispered words, once clouded, dim;
Enveloped, satin shades
Melodic hum of ancient hymns
Speaks peace to souls, afraid
Fanning ember’s dying flame
Sustaining weak and weary
Answered prayers of fragile framed
Winged messengers shant tarry
While cherub tears lap ash as sand
Like oceans ebb and flow
On silvered stairs that stretch to land
Seraph journey low
Feet, once treading golden streets
Gather, watching grace;
Heaven kissing earth, beneath
Among us, face to face
In Her Mind
She always has sweatshirts
Sleeves pulled up high
To hide her arm's scars
From that one time
She's reminded of the week
Away at the ward
Dealing with her thoughts
Fighting a long war
Though those scars are seen
Those red, long lines
They will fade away
The worst scars are in her mind
My scars ran deep, hidden beneath the surface.
But you came close and I thought you saw the real me.
You studied my past scars and said you accepted me anyway.
But eventually you realized they really were more than you could handle.
So you left.
and now I am covered in scars
You aren’t meant to be filled with empty pews
Angels roam abandoned cathedrals in order to feel holy—the hushed voices of confessions bounce off the walls ring in my ears forgive me father for I have sinned—you pray please do not leave me behind father but your prayers slide through your fingers wet and red—all at once we’ve come to realize we were never holy to begin with—so together we roam these hallowed halls in order to feel alive and hear the hushed prayers that have gone on unanswered
"Did you realize that we are both useless?"
"Yes John. Yes I did."