Profound Blankness

He smiled but it didn’t seem to reach his eyes.

He laughed but it sounded empty, false.

He cornered me, made me deaf with words of love,

mute with affirmations shoved down my throat.

I flashed white teeth in a big smile,

took what he gave me,

stayed blind to what he wouldn’t let me have.

We worked like this,

him being mean

me being soft

we both being liars.

And sure it hurt a fucking lot.

But that’s what pharmacies are for;

searching for something to kill the pain

so you can live in the moment 

fake contentment and stay sane.