unexplainable explainable brain breakage

back

resting on hard metal

of the bedframe i slept on

for most of my life

back

in the room where i

wished on baby teeth

scribbled on diaries

slept on rainbow sheets

didnt think it would

happen

here now

but i cried in the car

and

we pretended i didnt then

you

waited on me to pack a bag and

i couldnt

couldnt hold in

illogical tears

squatted besides a table

i painted for my sister and

held my hands over my mouth

and sobbed

and waited for you to find me

because i couldnt speak

cant speak

can never speak silent

back

behind the bed the door opened

and i didnt know it was you until you

put your hand on my

back

whispered

held me

waited

loved me

put everything you were carrying

back

until it was just us

and my tears

and i said im sorry

and you said i dont need to be

and we went back

to silence

tearsoaked fading carpet

warm arm around my shoulder

thoughts slowly fading back

to normal

back to someplace that lets me breathe

im still sorry

that i cant speak and i dont know what i am

but thank you for bringing me

back

12.29.24