splitting open my head wide until I can reach deep inside.
There's something bitter, dragging itself up from within me.
When my eyes peel open, I stare up into the gaping wide sky above me,
hoping to swallow it all. As if it might fill up the emptiness inside of me.
Still, I can feel it gnawing, tearing at me from inside, screaming to be let free.
burning harshly so much that I'm melting from the inside out.
Nothing to cure the burning, just the bitter taste of copper and flesh to bring me back to reality.
Note how the emptiness is carving itself further inside the dividing depths in me.
like the spoiled milk I forced upon my pressed lips. Sour in taste, caught in my throat from the consistency before I vomiting it all back up.
She can't expect me to keep drinking this, to delude myself into believing she is the innocent and I am the sinner.
I am her giver, she is my taker.
things I delude myself into believing we are separate. That I am 'leaving you behind,' not desperate enough to come back. I sever the things my instincts latch onto, cutting it away again and again. I cheer with each snapped chord, cry when I braid it back together and suffer at the noose I've wrangled around my soul.
If I could leave behind my vessel, to be free of you. To escape. I'm sure the strings would be begging to be reattached, to drag me back, to let her sink her claws into me. To let the emptiness dive back in and devour me from the inside out.
Sinking it's endless unbound grief, there is no repentance for the perpetual victim. There is only consumption, and consumption of the kin in its grief. Let me go. Let me go. I don't want to be attached anymore. I have nothing more I can release to her, because she is killing me anymore.
let's me take in air and wonder if I've been drinking in poison for years far longer than I came to realize. The breath I need to realize all the things I could have, that the world does not need to devour me and I it. I can be as free as I want so long as I sever the bonds that seek to bind me. Let me be her villain. I am the nightmare child she wanted me to always be.
I didn't use this one too much, but I found a sort of pattern in it that I enjoyed and that was all I gleaned from this one. I scrapped a majority of it.
like the cavern of the earth.
like the husk that's left behind.
A spark of flurry. I touch of fire and the heart is set ablaze. I care not for my fellow man, not in the way I brave. My hearts a sputter and curiosity is always at its brink. I cheer away the endless days and lock the door for my soul to keep still within. My soul is set asunder but blunders from the sky. The conscious mind takes float and leaves a body behind. Once more now.
Massive. Unbound. Untouchable by any. I'd tease the hands that grab and pry to drag me to my steady. A wild spirit from within. I live within no bounds. I may be crazy. I may be human but I am different, tall, and loud. I love nothing but everything. I desire no further fear. I live to see the curiosity before I've been set astill. So leave me up and unbound. I care little for the ground. My spirit shall take flight while the wolfen body growls from the grounds. Two parts within one body. Two minds within a soul. My will is but a measure of how bold I am to show the depth of all my reasoning. The depth of my despair. I am a free spirit and have long since moved on from my current dwelling. Catch me if you can. On both terms and you shall be considered very lucky.