My own personal hell

Hell

Undefined by atheists

Mine?

Day-to-day life

Depression settles in like an old friend

An ever-lasting cloud of hurt

Sinking right into my pores

But to others?

A monster.

An unwanted one.

To me?

It was my monster

It took me and held me like no one else

Whispering sweet nothings in my ear

"You deserve this pain."

"What's there to lose?"

Oh the phrases and sayings felt true

They were comfort

Bring down my mental illness to something hypothetical

Because to others, it does not exist out of my head

But it was impractical right?

It raged on my life with a never-ending vengeance

"Bleed one more time."

"Whos going to notice?"

The outside had to match the inside

So people know I'm hurting

But then what does that make me?

An attention seeker?

A pick me?

No.

I just don't want to feel this hurt anymore.