Do Not Reply

Hi!

Thanks for contacting me. This is an auto-response. So don't reply to it, or maybe do and I'll get a whole bunch of messages from people when I come back, that might be cool. I will be out of contact for the next 12 months, but I look forward to replying to your message, or messages, when I return. I found the daily distractions of civilization a little too, well, distracting so I am headed to a cabin in the forest to be by myself and write. Since I hate nature and the forest I feel like it will be the perfect place to really buckle down and get some words down on the page. I am very easily distracted so I thought maybe if I removed all the fun distractions and left only the boring nature-y ones I'd actually work. So that was my logic.

I promise I haven't been kidnapped and this is the kidnapper writing this message. I'm just too cowardly and lazy to have this conversation/ fight with everyone in my life. Although if I was a kidnapper I'd probably say that too so you're just going to have to trust me and not come looking for me while I unravel myself from society. But wouldn't that make an interesting story? A kidnapper who keeps messaging with all their victims friends? How long would it take anyone to notice? Maybe I've got something there. Or maybe it's been done a million times before. I should Google that. Anyway, I'm getting distracted.

I should go back and edit this auto-text into something more coherent, but I feel like this gives you the most honest version of why I need to get in my car and hope it gets me all the way to the cabin. Maybe I'll come back all mellow and zen and we can have a good laugh about this. Or maybe I'll be too famous because I'll have a hit novel on bookshelves and I won't want to talk to any of you anymore. Haha Or maybe I'll just be really into hiking and the woods and nature! Wouldn't that be weird? See you in a year! I'll be fine.