Challenge Ended
This is a form of writing called a triptych. It consists of 3 syllables per line, 3 lines per stanza and 6 or 9 stanzas per poem. Any subject. Have fun with it. *******If you are looking at this challenge at this point, please also look at some notes I published this morning under the title Triptych Challengers...it has some additional information I'd want you to be aware of. Thanks.*******
Ended May 21, 2016 • 58 Entries • Created by Bjc
Challenge
This is a form of writing called a triptych. It consists of 3 syllables per line, 3 lines per stanza and 6 or 9 stanzas per poem. Any subject. Have fun with it. *******If you are looking at this challenge at this point, please also look at some notes I published this morning under the title Triptych Challengers...it has some additional information I'd want you to be aware of. Thanks.*******
Give in or Fight
dark rising
flew away
should I stay
see my mind
line by line
words can bind
restricting
ties me down
make no sound
took over
dark soldiers
engulfed me
fighting back
laughing loud
blood pouring
overcame
beat them down
I conquered
bymr624
Thanks!
Bjc
A good effort here in a new form for writing. I have some observations/questions for you. You opened with rhymes in the first 3 stanzas and then abandoned rhymes in the last 3. Made me wonder why? I also found the lack of punctuation made it a little harder to read. It's not always needed but, in this case, I think it might smooth the pacing a little. But like I've repeated to everyone, this is your poem and your call. Thanks so much for participating in the challenge. Hope you enjoyed it.
bymr624
Thanks for the feedback! I'll be sure to use your advice next time! You're welcome! It was fun and a good first try!