The Weight of Truth
The details were laid out on the gurney
for his kids to sift through, like
pieces of glass
in his hair, the note
in his pocket
He took too many pills
then tried to gas himself
and our family dog
Lucky lived.
Dad dialed for help, but
died having his stomach pumped
Half-truths like this are told
to spare children the details.
The full weight was broken
into bits I could lift
once I tore grief and anger
into smaller pieces still
Your Dad
jumped out
of an ambulance
on the high way
en route to be convicted.
I have worn my heart out
wrestling with this
I drop it
Feels right to release these ashes
like all the apologies, the excuses,
the verdict that need not burden us...
Sometimes pain
weighs less than the justice
we inflict upon ourselves
Sometimes...the right choice is the heaviest
Photo by Egor Ivlev on Unsplash