Should’ve Known

I should’ve known something was off way before

Before the months of silence

When i hid that blade in the drawer

Before the thoughts of violence

When I held my breath imagining being no more

I should’ve known I was not okay

Before I was completely helpless

When I could almost make it through the day

Without being hopeless

Imagining from this life, a get away

But I told myself it’ll get better

If only I knew it would just get worse

I would have wrote my parents that letter

Before I started eyeing the pills in my purse

But I thought I could handle it

No need to worry anyone else

But boy was I wrong

I almost killed myself

All because my pride said not to speak up

And all along my brain said give up

My weak silence has me fed up

No longer afraid I will speak up

Not because I want to

But because I need to

To save the others who have a plan

Keep their idea of their end at hand

As hard as it might be

Speak to someone, you might see

Not what you lack but what you have

You have nothing to lose

Reach your hand out, you’d be surprised who all grabs

To lift you back up and tell you your worth

You’d be amazed by the support you have

Now maybe your thinking who?

No one loves or cares about you

I am here, that is not the case

Together this battle we’ll face