An unknown felling of happiness and fear

Lost and confused,

Her words…

Don’t clarify her actions,

Not sure what I did wrong,

Still I’m to blame for all that’s happened.

“Sleep on the couch”,

“You make me sick”,

“I don’t feel good”,

“Why do you stink?”,

What do you need?

“Stop making me think”,

“Stop being annoying”,

“I need you to leave”,

I ask what’s wrong,

All I’m told...

“It’s not you, it’s me”,

So I leave,

But then I think...

What’s the harm in talking?

“Please stop calling”,

“I feel like I can’t breath”,

So I wait…

And wait...

Until I feel there’s space for me,

Then I act,

“Your acting crazy, don’t you see?”,

So I just let it be,

And just like that,

She messaged me,

“Did you eat?”,

I had...

Still I said no,

Got ready to go,

If she made room,

I can too,

Turns out...

That was not the thing to do.

“You need to eat”,

“Take care of yourself”,

“I shouldn’t have to tell you this ”,

“You should care about your health “,

I replied,

I did,

I do,

You don’t,

I ate,

“You lied?!”,

Ahhhhhh!

Nevermind,

I can’t give up,

So I say good night,

“Can you cut your hair?”,

“I think I hate it”,

“You hate it right?”

I’m so confused,

Yet can’t forget,

To just be patient...

I’m not the one who’s pregnant.