Fart Swapping: A Love Story
This is a true story, and not one for the prim and proper “mature” couples out there.
My boyfriend and I were dating for three years when this happened. We were at a public camping event that had indoor plumbing and around 300 total attendees and staff.
It's a clear night, everyone here is friendly, loving, and we’re being our usual lovey-dovey selves. We’d just gotten out of the shower and into our warm little onesies. Because that’s who we are.
His is Batman with a butt-flap, and mine is Harley Quinn with the sprouting Jester bells on the hood. (Like bunny ears.) We stop by our tent to drop off our towels and day clothes before meeting up with our friends.
I’m bending over, only the top half of my body is inside the tent, and he pushes a small bit of weight onto my butt. I’m thinking he’s doing that weird play-humping thing people do sometimes, so I just laugh.
A puff of warm air vibrates onto my ass, and his laughter rings out into the night. I slowly stand up, releasing a heavy breath and looking at him with blank eyes. When his laughter turns to fear, I’m confident my revenge will be sweet.
I grab him by his shoulders and push him a few steps back, turning him away from me. I wind up my (still damp) towel into a rat tail. My target? His ass!
I whip the towel toward him, but I didn’t move him far enough. The towel wraps itself around him, and the end snaps the tip of his penis.
At the sound of his cry, in the middle of Tent City, everyone pokes out to see Batman grab his crotch, kneeling and groaning in pain while Harley Quinn yells variations of ‘that’s what you get’ and ‘what the fuck is wrong with you?’
That was about a year ago. We’re still together, and madly in love. This level of ridiculousness is a huge part of our lives and I wouldn’t have it any other way.