Left Side Brain

Nature was my goddess, the sun a glowing muse burning up every fiber of my being. Every breath belonged to the trees, every shiver mimicked a chilly breeze and every tear was matched by that of an empathetic sky.

I wonder how that night managed to make it anywhere close to my soul. It had been a while. In any recollection of recent memories, my optimism towards the world was nowhere to be found. Hidden away in whatever moss-covered cavern was tucked away in my head. It was alarming, I had searched for it for many years. Ducking the winds of apathy and trekking the plains of indifference. To no avail I sought out the outlook on the world I was unsure if I was even capable of having. For a billion years in the bitter vain of existence, nothing tasted sweeter to me than a graze with death. A dance with the devil in my mind was all but too common. I found solitude in dark corners I never knew I had. I wanted peace , for everything to stop, for silence , for warmth , for a solution .

I wanted shelter from the bitter war I had started in my head, a coward I ran from the fighting only to find myself lost in the mountain ranges of my mind. I was stranded in a place I thought I knew all too well. In looking for a sense of direction I found east and west indistinguishable, my moral compass lacked a north. Every bridge I found was rotted, every puddle presented me with a reflection unrecognizable to me.

I was scared. I had been wondering for so long I didn’t know if id ever find a way out. In the sky I saw my life, flashing by day after day except it wasn’t me. I was here and the outside world was an atmosphere away. If I were high enough, I could almost feel the other side, but I’d have to keep walking eventually. My feet were tired, and my hands were dirty. I was certain the only way out of my mind was out of existence. I didn’t know where I was going and at that rate I didn’t want to find out.