Anxiety is Kinda of Like

You sweat like you ran five miles

But you didn’t

You barely walked from one classroom to another

Pits damper than a swamp

And stench worse too

You think everyone can smell it, even as it dries

So you clump down your arms

And now you’re sweating about anxiety sweats

God, I should have worn more deodorant

~you five minutes after reapplying it

Now, you’re rifling through your backpack

Searching for something you saw in there five minutes ago

Because what if a magic elf stole it in that time?

Too unrealistic?

Doesn’t matter

It could happen

You can’t wear nail polish anymore

Even though it’s soo pretty

Because what if

You swallow some while chewing on your nails

That could kill you, you know

Now your fingers are tapping

Along the metal bus stop

As you watch the bus drive away

It was too crowded

Even though there were seats left

They just have people next to them

It’s easier this way

So you slouch against the bench seat

Eyelids finally heavier than your thoughts

You’re so fucking tired

Tired of sweating, searching, chewing, worrying

But when you wake

You know you’ll do it all again

Because it was never a choice