Crime and Punishment
You will never get close to me ever again.
A silent vow as I look out the window,
Avoiding my friend's gaze and the noise
As I try to shake the day off and ward off
The thoughts of blood and pain again.
I am a fool for the last time, that I vow.
Now I am a fool again, falling once more
Though the signs are different now.
I'm older and this one is a lot nicer to me,
Yet I still flashback to that day at lunch,
Looking at what he said about me in my diary,
Promising I will never cry like this again.
Life continued and I played them like puppets,
Saying what they want to here and playing along
Only to pull the carpet out from under them
And walk away grinning, knowing I escaped again
From almost falling and breaking my neck
Thinking there was someone waiting for me below.
Yet I've failed my latest trick and am falling.
But this time, I feel the fear in my throat
And the uncertainty desperately blocking the sun.
I want to believe things are different now,
That I have grown up from everything in the past,
But some things I just can't get over apparently.