dissipate

My mouth is eating me alive. Letting my insides melt away until I’m all sharp edges. It’s like a balancing act I never perfect. Because the lesser part of me feels more when I neglect my plate. When my scale slowly dips digit by digit. When the clothes start to bunch and hang a bit loose at the seams. It’s like a tightrope, but I always lose. Because the disappearing side has less to hold up. And the side that’s filling itself full, all goes crashing. It’s like the weight is pulling me into the ground. Burying me, still breathing. So I empty into earthquakes. Shake, rattle, roll. Let my insides reverberate as canyon-echo tremor. And it’s like the dirt falls away with each churning shudder. Aching and stained. And I finally float.