i can’t see who i used to be

i built a grave

out of bedsheets

and buried you between-

tucking you in tight enough

to suffocate your childish giggles

desperately,

i placed your purple bike

in the basement

so like me,

it could collect dust

in solitude

i carried your old hobbies

to the fireplace

and watched them burn-

and i didn't speak

to your parents

about what i'd done

-time changes a person-

there is still a part of you

in my soul

but i know what is dead

cannot be revived

now i can't find the pieces of you

that i need

i do not feel alive