I can’t name it

scary dark alone cold

empty hollow

bitter sweet

ashes

death

yet

feels like home

calm, comforting

like here,

you don't have do anything

you don't have to be anything

just.

you

it feels like a tempting sweet illusion

a lie

yet

it feels also like a truth

a plainly,

disgusting truth

you

can't face

but you do

you have to

you need to

and once you look into the darkness and it looks back

you are swallowed

you can't ever go back

and you don't want to

(but you do)

it's like waking from a dream that was sweet and you never wanted to wake up

but you did. you had to

and now you have to face the world

but you close your eyes and hide

try to crush the little voice in the back of your head

it's unknown scary confusing

you want to escape yet you don't

you don't have a choice but you do

it's bare

its doesn't make sense

and you don't want it to make sense or

do you?

.