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Challenge Ended
Challenge of the Week CVI
Betrayal. Tell the story of broken trust. Write about betrayal. Fiction or non-fiction, poetry or Prose.
Ended January 23, 2019 • 104 Entries • Created by Prose
Challenge
Challenge of the Week CVI
Betrayal. Tell the story of broken trust. Write about betrayal. Fiction or non-fiction, poetry or Prose.
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austriangirl

cheated and cheater

Infidelity.

'Cheater', the word cries.

'Unfaithful', 'untrustworthy', it screams.

'Betrayer' is the name the letters throw at my face.

'Disloyal, that is what you are', they point.

I am accused of these.

And all these accusations would not be wrong.

For all of this and more is what I am.

But I have not acted with or against anyone else.

I have not been with one behind another's back.

I have not acted detestably towards anyone I know.

I have not even gossiped or lied about a friend.

No, not even that.

Not this time.

This time it was myself.

Against myself, I have committed all of these crimes.

I allowed your curious hands to cross my boundaries and go where they should not have been.

It was against my own body, my own mind, my own soul that I committed the offense.

I cheated on myself,

Even if it was your fingers on my skin, your body next to mine.

I was unfaithful to the lines I drew,

Untrustworthy was my will and strength in keeping myself until I was fully ready to give myself away.

I betrayed my own trust, and now I can't be alone with someone without being afraid of what might happen.

It was against myself that I was disloyal, against my whole being.

I broke the vows and promises I made to myself.

I whispered I was fine when I wanted to scream and make it stop.

I lied to you when I said I was ok and I lied to myself thinking I could be.

My lips betrayed me when I needed them most.

My body froze when I needed it to push me away from you and you away from me.

To push us away from each other.

Now I feel both the shame and regret of the cheater,

As well as the pain and deception of the cheated.

And maybe I deserve both...

Maybe I deserve both.

I am 21 years or older.