Dear applicant

We found your application to be quite impressive at first, but when we attempted to contact you for further information, something I might add that we tried to do fifteen times over the past week, we were unable to even locate your psionic resonance, let alone transmit the request.

After further investigation it appears that you possess no psychic powers at all, so, as any attempt at telepathic communication is impossible, your application has been denied.

Our agent may not have been recognised by you as he walked past you as you stacked shelves in your local Tesco, but I assure you, his mind probe was quite thorough and I regret to inform you that not only do you not possess the mental capacity to acquire such abilities, you lack even the most basic education required to even try.

Please do not contact us again. I warn you now, if such an attempt is made the next agent you encounter will wipe you, not just probe.