natsukashi; nostalgic

maybe i was wrong

to overthink

what you meant

what we

meant.

when you would sit alone

blinded in the

white light of the

convenience store

let me tell you

that

i loved you

and you

loved me

when you would close your eyes

and stare into the abyss of

black

did you think

of me

because i thought of you.

what ever happened to lying under starry nights,

grasping for what wasn't there

smiling together for the first time in weeks

because the night was

special

and us?

special

the grass dancing in the brisk wind

lightly caressing our warm bodies

pressed

to the ground

pushed down

together

when you looked over

the ancient wood in your

eyes

that gleamed in the dark

and made the world seem

even the smallest bit

lighter

you would pretend

and dont get me wrong, i would too

that we didnt notice our hands

slowly

grasping each other

fingers intertwined, tightening, sweating

sweat that poured from our bodies

souls

hearts

combined and shut closed

stuck in our palms, mixed

with the blood and

tears of the past

when we

were not one together, combined

but two

a seperate two, distant

when all we felt was empty

and desire

for destruction and death

but together

as i watch you sit at your desk in the orange sunlight

waiting for the final ring of

the bell

with the small piece of paper next to me

that was bursting so much

you couldn't bare to wait any longer

until the bell did ring

and when i opened

its scented folds

i knew

i loved you

but that

was old

and a new was waiting

around the corner

for we weren't in highschool forever

and eventually

our short lived love

would slowly

sink

to the bottom of the muddy river

its ink spread

scattered

and your hand

grasping its aged paper

shattering at the simple touch of your

warm fingers

once in my embrace

now burnt cold

and gone

dead, numb

your skin growing paler by the minute

and your love

faded

gone

ha

how nostalgic