I started lifting weights the other day,
because apparently it’s a good way
to deal with your problems.
But I realized rather quickly,
on like, the second or third repetition
of the first set- my arms were wobbly,
sweaty and shaking and bulbous veins,
that I had no idea what I was doing.
I’m in here, trying to work things out
just like everyone else, and yet
I’m embarrassed and hope no one noticed
my 75 pound bar that I wrestle with.
I see bigger, stronger women and men here,
their bars over their heads, screaming, panting, straining,
as they slam them down on the ground
feeling so accomplished, so relieved.
But I’m screaming too!
Screaming because everything burns
because I’m so weak and everyone is watching.
because I’m pushing so hard but the bar isn’t even moving!