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Challenge of the Week #55: Write a story of 200 words or more about a stranger. The most masterfully written piece, as voted and determined by the Prose team, will be crowned winner and receive $200. Quality beats quantity, always, but numbers make things easier for our judges, so share, share, share with friends, family, and connections. #ProseChallenge #getlit #itslit
Cover image for post Vortex of Madness, by sandflea68
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sandflea68

Vortex of Madness

Whirling, swirling, swiftly

       Madness stranger creeps in

       planting subliminal messages

       of insanity into my mind

       the voices, the voices

       mindless masked intruder

       digging graves of no meaning

       finger hooked into my wall

       in insane dots of fractured thought.

Whirling, swirling, swiftly

       Stranger absorbs me, takes me away

       caterwauling rhymes of madness

       ebony rocks striking my face

       unpredictable fire - sweet and sour

       elevator erupting up but never stopping

       dressing me with mad sparkled wreaths

       blinks of delusion smite my eyes

       spinning, spinning out of control.

Whirling, swirling, swiftly

       nonsense words scar my festering soul

       moonlight falls out of loveless sky

       collapsing into sunken eyes of mine.

       dried up barren well, I lick my lips

       feeling nothing, locked in darkness

       heartbeat freezes, I don’t breathe

       craziness prevails as I sigh softly

       we are not so different after all.

Whirling, Swirling, Swiftly

       Insanity is earth, twisted and fractured

       marigolds marching, invading, closing ranks

       madness is genius, kicking and screaming

       bones jabbed with pain, without release

       cemented feeling encasing my blackness

       obsessed with death, don’t know where I am.

       blooms of craziness hurled by stranger

       infiltration of fogginess, flowing madness

       mind wanderer lost in struggle evermore

       out, out damned spot, blood on my hands.

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sandflea68 
This was written while I am taking pain meds for shingles so I just decided to go with the loopy flow!!
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sandflea68 
@Helenalyn Thank you so much for reposting this.
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Helenalyn 
Of course! It's really cool. Lyrical. If that is what meds does, then bring em on!
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sandflea68 
@Helenaly My shingles are in my upper right face so I have reason to be feeling mad!
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Dark 
I was actually going to ask if you were smoking opium whilst writing...love your last line
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sandflea68 
@Dark Ha!Ha! Just thought I'd see how I'd write when not thinking clearly.
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Abi_J 
I really like the Macbeth reference at the end, it's definitely one of my favorite plays. I found myself reading faster and faster, maybe because of the lack of punctuation, but I like that it doesn't pause.
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JamesMByers 
Bam! Way to nail the challenge, @sandflea68!!! Love the "Macbeth" reference at the end. You're amazing!!!
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sandflea68 
@Abi_J I'm glad you noticed the lack of punctuation. I didn't feel I should use it and glad it read faster for you. The Macbeth quotation just seemed right to me. Thank you.
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sandflea68 
@JamesMByers Thank you so much for reading this and reposting. I loved your entry also.
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honey010203 
I am seriously still in awe at how amazing this is. I can't pick a favorite line. So well written!
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sandflea68 
@Mel Thank you so much for reading and reposting this. I still think you are one of the most talented writers here. You always have something to say in such a unique way.
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PhynneBelle 
You had me at "whirling." The form is so arresting. I felt the madness pushing against constraints.
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sandflea68 
@PhynneBelle Thank you for seeing what I was trying to do!
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PhynneBelle 
You're welcome! I just read the previous comments...shingles? Ugh! And you still managed to focus and write something beautiful.
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sandflea68 
@PhynneBelle Thank you. You are always so supportive and such a great person!
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AmandaCary 
This is absolutely beautiful and haunting...damn. I can't believe I missed this! I seem to miss so many of my favorites lately...my feed has completely changed! I've got to figure out how to fix it.
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sandflea68 
@AmandaCary Thank you, my lovely friend. I got this in late because I have come down with shingles on my face and am looped up on pain meds!
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AmandaCary 
Oh no!! I'm so sorry....shingles are awful. I truly feel for you. :( My sister had them once on her arm, and she said they were the most excruciating, weird, and annoying pain she's ever experienced. You've got all my happy vibes and well wishes coming your way, sweet friend. I hope you feel better very soon and I hope those pain meds are the bomb! <3 <3 <3
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sandflea68 
@AmandaCary I feel your happy vibes emanating this way! Thank you.
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Lish 
Excellent as always! I hope you're feeling better! But feel free to take those meds again and write some more, I'd love to read more "loopy writes" ;)
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sandflea68 
@Lish There's good in everything, I guess! Ha Ha! Thank you for the comments, my friend.
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Firdaus 
Shingles on your face! Omg! That's awful. I had them on my waist a few months ago and I feel your pain. Despite that you managed this beautifully crazy poem. You're a fantastic writer. So talented. I hope you feel better soon. <3
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sandflea68 
@Firdaus I am hibernating in my house for a month until the rash disappears! Actually, I went to the beach yesterday at dusk and had a picnic on the beach with my husband to get out of the house. Thank you for your sympathy and your wonderful comments.
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Firdaus 
I'm glad your husband is doing well too. A beach picnic sounds so good. Get well soon my friend. <3
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nehasri 
I just had to read it when I read "Vortex of madness". I started reading and was blown away by the first verse itself and that's when I scrolled back up and saw it was you. Had to be! You are such a fine writer, it's a privilege to be sharing the Prose platform with people like yourself :)
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sandflea68 
@Phantina Thank you for your like.
I am 21 years or older.