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Queen of Lightning in exile
28 Posts • 180 Followers • 48 Following
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Dagger Girl

You slip me under your ribs so well that I forget what I am. I am one with your lung and I hold your breath until you are ready to let go.

I am the dagger. You used me to end yourself and now I’m paying the price. Because no one told me daggers can feel pain. And I didn’t tell you you could use me to hurt yourself.

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Blink

Trust me to hurt you.

I remember things you only see.

I blink and a year has passed before me. You are still behind me.

I’m not looking for you anymore. But I know just where to point my gun.

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Wake

She was a knife point. Bursting from within clean unblemished skin. And nothing would stand in her way.

Then he came along. He pulled down her walls and peeled under her skin. He saw her for what she was.

She was a ruiner. And nothing would stand in her wake.

He was a fixer. And somehow he never left her side.

Neither would ever be the same.

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Bandages

Something about that paper package sealing the healing into the bandaid makes my heart melt.

The simple act of placing a bandaid on a cut or scrape

Shows a level of caring that’s hard to find.

You are showing a readiness to heal and asking for your body’s permission to be fixed.

Scars may be there but the bandages tell your body you love it.

Every body deserves a bandage.

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Rip

I feel it slightly in my waking hours. It trials me like a cape, making all part for me to pass.

At night, when all eyes are covered, it scratches me. Trying to remember who I am. I awake to small scans lining my legs and arms. I am a patchwork enigma torn between finding a solution and finding a thread and tugging until I rip open.

This will not define me but it just might.

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Ghost

I am the dark purple to my mustard yellow past, a bruise of a ghost.

- an ode to who I was with you

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Sinking

We are already sinking so why not push me under?

I already can’t laugh without losing breath, just take it all away. I’m struggling to exist with you and without you. I feel the deep blue of you infecting my body and leaving me to the waves to beat. All I want is to float but you are so determined to drown me that you don’t see the fire burning in my eyes.

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Crowd

There’s something heavy about listening to music that pulls the pain out of your soul and throws it in your ears. The voices in my head usually have bad things to say but not when I crowd them in with the voices in my ears.

Don’t underestimate the power of a bad song.

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Patchwork

And somehow it was always easier to keep secrets than tell truths that would make faces crumble and hearts break.

This is how I became a patchwork girl, fragmented by the half truths I’ve told all my life.

I’m in so deep I don’t remember how to be honest with myself.

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Stain

If every tear I shed stained my skin I would be a map of my pain.

If only you would look past my pain and see the joy I could have with you.

But you won’t.

You can’t stand to look at someone so splintered.

Maybe you should try looking in a mirror.

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