Secrets, They’re hard to keep

as you sow, so shall you reap

don’t tell she said

this secret will hang over your head

You will take it to your grave

Do not miss behave

Or your be my slave

do not missinterpret

The big bad secret

She said she liked John

The bone is gone

She said don't tell

Then she fell

hopeing in hell

I wont Swell

the secret to him

Or else she will swim

She will be dead

My blood will be red

and gone shall be my head

Does this ring a bell

I shall not know

why I am in a detective portfolio

I’ve been having an affair with a lady

Most can’t understand

But nothing in this world

Makes me feel the way she can

Since the first time that I held her

I knew she was the one

Never questioning or judging

Despite the things I have done

In the weeks before I met her

I cried a million tears

She made life seem eurphoic

Sweet reprieve from my nightmares

She's been my dirty little secret

For about a year

But secrets lead to lies

Creating a love that's insincere

When she's left me lonely

I can't get out of bed

And the diabolical voices

Begin screaming madness in my head

I’ve kept our love a secret

As it is a mortal sin

Faith and hope escaped

Replaced by darkness deep within

Inflicting torture so obscene

Left on the brink of insanity

Filled with anger, rage, and hate

Am I headed for my death

Or some other deserving fate

I do love Tina....

Most days of the week

But with every flick of my Bic

A divorce is what I truly seek

Tina’s far from beautiful

Nothing but a dirty little whore

But the second she’s gone

I’d kill for just a tiny bit more

What I’ve learned about Tina

She comes with one guarantee

For her to leave someone must die

And that someone won’t be me

I refuse to let her kill me

Even though I’m not afraid of death

I always call her Tina

But her name is really Crystal...

My whole body screams with pain as it is aching to release the pain inside. I often feel alone in this world. Like no one understands me or no one knows what i'm going through. I don't tell people what I feel or what's going on. I just tell my cat or god. I know stupid right? Anyways, the real reason why I don't share my thoughts or feelings with the world, is because i'm afraid of what they'll say. I've been called crazy and stupid before. I've been told to shut up, or that I need some fresh air, I need sleep or it's nothing. They think it's a joke. They think i'm kidding or as if it's an act. They ignore it. This is why I don't share anything anymore and believe me, it kills me because i'm the type of person that's not afraid to speak my mind. Not afraid of what people think of me. Or at least i used to not be afraid. But now I am because i've been turned down and hurt before so many times. And I feel like there's a lot of people out there that are afraid. And it's ok to be afraid. Just know that there are people out there who you CAN trust and confide in. You just have to be patient and look.

1.) When I was five, I had a crush on the character Pippin from Lord of the Rings.

2.) I wanted very badly to take him up on his offer to get a hotel room together. (I'm glad I didn't.)

3.) He wasn't good in bed. (Or couch, in this case.)

4.) Every time we go back to our hometown, we find a new spot to pull over and make some... interesting memories. These include the ball field, his old house (after he has moved out for like a year), and a church parking lot on more than one occasion.

5.) I used napkins to clean up an especially awkward mess on a guy's face one time. It was his own.

6.) At one point, I had a crush on my best friend but never told her. Too awkward to say now.

This whole thing began back in elementary school, maybe fourth grade. I went to this summer camp every year, and my four closest friends did as well. One year, one of those friends (let's call her Sophie) came to us and said that she felt like the place was haunted, and she was being possessed by one of the ghosts. She seemed to be so sure of it that none of us doubted her all that much. She would act different, her voice would even sound a bit off. When she was "possessed" she would call herself Anastasia, I believe. I don't know what drew me to do this, but I decided that one day I would go along with her, and I pretended to be possessed as well, calling myself Jack. Jack was Anastasia's husband, and Sophie and I would actually walk around holding hands and such. I knew I was pretending, but none of my friends ever did. Sometimes I wonder if we actually were possessed, because Sophie, as Anastasia, seemed to know Jack, and never asked what I was doing. The other odd thing about it was my voice. Anastasia and Jack were British, and I knew Sophie was great at a British accent, even when not possessed. But as for myself, that's a different story. I have never been able to do a proper British accent, yet when I was "possessed", I could do it perfectly. I still don't know if Sophie was acting, but to this day, I never asked her, nor have I told them about the two months of "possession" I experienced. I also never told anyone about how I nearly got my hand stuck in a rat trap under the bleachers in the gym that summer. I blame Jack for that. In reality, I was an idiot and I thought it would be funny to mess with it and try to set it off.

jesus christ i have too many secrets to fill up this page, but i can’t even admit them to myself, let alone this traceable ip adress. i can only let go of the silly details, the terribly-horendous ones that nobody would blink at.

secret 1: i blame my mother, i blame my ex-bestfriend, i blame my sibling.

secret 2: sometimes my anxiety gets so bad my heart beats out of my chest and i’m shaking and all i want to do is let is fucking bleed out of my body.

secret 3: i don’t feel like a survivor. i don’t think anything really bad happened. everyone is out here saying i’m special because i’m alive, or whatever, and here i am, throwing that away in the name of vanity.

secret 4: i keep all my feelings locked in my chest. i won’t let you know how i’m feeling, i won’t let you in, because you haven’t hurt me.

secret 5: goddamn, i feel like people are constantly watching me, constantly judging.

secret 6: if you decode these, i won’t tell you if it’s true.

There are things that you just can't tell people, whether it be someone else's secret or your own. The anticipation of knowing something no one else does may eat you up inside. The thought of knowing something, and not being able to talk about it may kill you too. Although you have to remember that people trust you with their stories, and that it isn't your story to tell.