Dearest Reaper

Your peepers look. Worse for wear.

Seen as an affront. Am I.

To you? I question. Why?

While you have not. And blindly serve without a thought. The instiller. Of the I’ll swill confounding. I whom it’s attributed.

Am I not...Honest?

I’n the least if need be?

Do agree we. To some juxtaposition?

Believe who? Him? Or his image?

I guess you could call this a solitary scrimmage.

My candor. (The “Lit” at which your peering) Alone. Deserves possibly.

A return to... Not.

From the. Naught.

Body list.

A place run afoul. Fraught with haughtiness.

For I’m just the pot. Where’s the kettle in all of this?

My plea.

A not thoughtless beast. Conceit. I pre-empt animal. So much of my crimes. Designed intelligent. And thanks to you. Intangible.

I’m the one you had in mind. After all. A fine young cannibal. So Judge & Jury. Would you now execute?

I who is tangible.

You.

Although I've played some great pranks this year. I can assure you I'm an all-round kind person.

Remember that one time Friend D asked me for the phone number of Friend F and I gave her pizza pizza's number (which she actually texted) well I can assure you it was out of the kindness of my soul. I was trying to test her awareness of human cruelty, y'know make sure no actual evil people exploit her trust and stuff. It was a simulation. Only to show I care.

And Friend T - who I repeatedly stole books from, and harrassed in her own dorm - that was just me, re-enacting the role of a robber. I was training her for the day a ninja strikes her dorm room and bags up all those great novels she keeps getting. I only successfully stole her books like four times, and offered Friend T her own mint like 1 time, and reorganized her room... a few times. Plus, I always return all those books I steal just before getting on my bus.

If you see a certain T-named user comment on this post, don't listen to her, I'm warning you out of the kind, nice, sincere, friendly-spirited person that I am. If I was a naughty person, I'd have already wrote my name on Reaper's nice list, but the scroll I have in my fingers titled, "Reaper's Naughty and Nice list", which I did not steal, has no such name anywhere in sight. Though, I will guard it for safekeeping tonight.

Since I'm a nice person.