Old aunt Mary with her bad knee, one step, two, she trips over the tree.

AND LINE 13 JOYS OF X MAS CONTINUED

but alas, as good ol'dad turns around, he falls over Aunt Mary tinsel tangled on the ground.

LINE 18 and 19

Oh No cried Dad and covered his head, the rest of his face had turned quite red. Peewee the dog ran out in a flash, burying the toupee with the reat of his stash.

LINE 24 and 25 and 26

Carolers arrive, such a joyous sound, hark what have we here, a man digging up the ground. In a large hat, Dad mutters and digs, where has that f***ing dog put my wig?This man needs help, the ground's frozen hard, come on carolers, let's dig up the yard!

LINE 28, 29 and 30

Without noticing the toupe looked worse for wear. Dad plopped it back on his head and presto he had hair.

The yard full of holes, hands like ice, come inside, said Dad, it's warm and nice.

The room filled up with much chat and good cheer, the tree stood askew, the floor had been cleared.

LINE, I believe, 31 and a bit more. ANYONE ELSE to finish it.........

Square dance sweaty, some romantic winks, food and gifts and loads of drinks. Everyone danced well into the night, dad did some breakdancing and gave gran a fright. After a headspin he was bald once again, but moved into a freeze with a big fat grin.

The hour's but quarter to seven, and biscuits are starting to leaven

AND LINE 15!

Till Cousin Brun-Hilda shrieked, "a Rat!" while chucking her heirloom red cloche-hat

AND LINE 33!!

Ahh... well-now, we're ready then perchance, for music and a good-old square-dance?