Time strikes half past dead

as damp marble façade crumbles

in still pond of crimson sorrow.

Deep cobalt shadows of dusk

pulsing as insanity cowers and hides,

mighty tempest dwelling in my head

tingling without touch in undying sun.

Layered shadows of abstract depths,

blinks of delusion smite my eyes,

drinking rancid tears of fallen grief.

Hourglass of life drifting away

voices of past will not be stilled.

Believe me.

We are all broken.

stay away

There is NO better.

We are impatient creatures.

We're used to being used.

We cannot breathe.

Cannot feel. 

Too many regrets

For we are lost.

Forever

One glance. 

It is over.

There is nothing when it is the end.

It is too much.

let us fall.

dead

lost at sea

hardly subconscious

humanity

roots beautiful

instinct

mud on a moon beam

in drip tease

for merely asking

your death drumming

-me next

as a ghost adrift

against your ribs

your intent

unexpected

for the beauty of a moment

when the world passes you by

-M.E.

201702102051

anxiety tale

yet i declined

so empty a man.

echoing of rattled glass

tell her your needs

embrace imprisoned; merely being here

too busy feasting on anxiety and fear.

while they tango till they're sore

the evanescence of your cataclysmic embodying

the depth of your volume

now you will never be unseen!

each beat tattoos your love

you'll stay by my side

the riptide of memory.

quite peculiar i feel to be

to conquer all qualms

in the promise that burns the blades of my sanity.

softly blending the scraps of my existence

falling tragically

your icy cold embrace

midnight eyes, hollow

swim within the wind, calm somber

when the cloud bursts.

my arms tire with repairs

only you can gently peel each new petal

tossing impersonal quasi-pleasantries

i see the things hidden in the world.

dwelling in  indecision and deflection

just to watch it all gleam away

but they only bury deeper inside my soul.

when shadows are waltzing

inch by inch with fury; unforgiving

shall they rest where rest un-come

with a voice so sweet.

keep your vintage desires

that helps you build your life

the clarity that reveals

my hands are still stained.

© Meg. 2017

40 lines from 40 of my poems. Unedited. No Arrangement (except listed newest poem to oldest poem written).

Leaves fell to the ground that day

On a cold January night.

I am a lost boy

No goals, no ambitions

It's late at night and I'm trying to let my emotions loose

These feelings inside won't leave.

Dear young me:

It's me

Please come back.

Things are just rough.

Cold hands

Held down by my own fears

"What Am I?"

I chased after your image

A young man

For you are the closest to me

I don't want to be average

Devoid of thought

Aimlessly going through the days

It's always on my mind

Yet I am a coward

Say, won't you come back?

Please save me

Help

The answer lies with you

At least, I hope so

i. of love and loss

I call, yet you don't hear

Instead, your hand squeezes my heart

I long to be loved, 

My heart is hardened and cold

Missing the feel of being yours. 

ii. of pain

I can't live any longer

While I'm bursting at the seams. 

Just give me another chance;

I'm tired of trying,

I'm sick of this fight, 

I shut the world away.

iii. of fear

I'm most afraid of

Unanswerable questions, like

Where will I go if I only believe in Hell?

I'll forever be scared of losing everyone, 

I see it sometimes in your eyes;

It's a fear of dying.

iv. enemy 

You had malicious intent

And even after this, you wouldn't let me in. 

You were not the air I breathed, 

You feed me the lies, 

But I'm addicted to you.

v. reflections on character

I like the feeling of this moment

But we don't live in a perfect world;

A lot of things can destroy me. 

I need to trust more and fear less,

Yet all my thoughts are trapped, my words all cease.

Your silence screams at me, 

But [is] beautiful nonetheless.

I don't want to change.

Hugging Knees to Chest,

I didn't mean for it all to fall apart,

'Tis such a sad sight,

Rainy days may fade away,

What about today?

That moment when it begins again,

People ask me why I write.

Stacking my plate high,

The room is spinning,

Capricious,

How can I truly be me in this state?

I can feel it coursing through me,

Billowing waves of cutthroat emotion,

When I look back at the past,

I look around after my choice,

Have you ever felt so powerless?

It's a sad feeling,

The depressive words.

I've reached that point where I don't know.

We put on fake grins,

They always say it's fine

Now it's just too much,

I long forgot the key to walk my path.

It's nothing to me,

I do declare Sir,

Death could be a beautiful thing.

The heat of the sun,

The light was bright,

Screaming, falling, gone.

Dangling, I'm a shadow on dawn.

I smile as I swing.

Here I am.

Unsure of your intentions,

enthusiastic dreams

invading foreign territory

illuminated by moments of

spirituality with effort--

one true constant

brings contentment

and consumes my thoughts.

Days spent in ignorance,

decisions renders in time

as sunlight ebbs,

though we have no eyes.

Saccharine tears drip down my skin.

I dreamt of your ghost (last night) 

You made me a demon

From a wound long open

You realize

And my memories

Skeletons of trees

What we see

Growing in size

Sweet like sugar

Lost in space

We were the ones being judged

They care too much

You touch the mirror and they do too

The fast cars

A lie

And I guess you're right

Has finally come for revenge

Even if that means nothing

When all of them are wrong

Goes their dinner

In what I'm writing

We all use controls

Life as you knew it

Cover her skin

That is completely real

Yet I'm still typing

Surrounds your lies

That a right number

And get rid of this lie

So laugh at my face

Grow out of sight

And you are as stupid

And diabetes and more

And some twitch or look away

A world of pollution

I have a pen name

I don't give a name anyway

What did I do?

Judging me

Even if I'm not

That was ever true to us

Well once you realize

There is nothing left to say

A figment of my imagination

We all just needed hope

So I thank all of you

You only really chose to help me

And neither one

And I will turn you in

And no one wonders where you are

And I hope you all live to grow old

That better days are

Guess what I forgive you.

Let me explain:

I took all of these from my poem book Demons and it was rough. Each line is the exact line in that one poem or the closest line to it. Each line is from a different poem. It isn't supposed to make sense.

I fell in love with words

“you have no shame”

I see it now coming down the line 

He had the sky in his eyes

Patience is not a virtue it's a curse

We are creatures of darkness

creativity came, slapped me in the face with reality and left me in shambles

death has invited me into her home too many times to count

She makes me cough up words which I have never said before

more than the times the ocean kisses the shore

she has bloomed

I am not good

I will look for the public positive

Just when it seems I've run out of words to say; I vomit up more than I have ever thought of

i got a rainbow of colors everyday

I can't write anymore

i thought i was stronger

no, i am just too passionate

am I a prison

he was Icarus

he reminds me he's there for months

the only word I can choke out after what you've done to me

statistically impossible

mantra of a liar

forgotten

Familiarity breeds comfort

But I cannot speak

your skin is a mixture of billions of years of hardships 

You are not less

shriek till your head aches

You keep playing until one kills you

And you thank them