did it feel good? - !! TW : S#LF H#RM !!
did it feel good?
watching the ends of your lucious hair
fall to the ground with each snip and snap
as your tears stained the carpet with misery.
did it feel good?
did you feel like
you finally had control over your life?
pathetic.
did it feel good?
watching your delicate skin scar
tracing it with the end of your sharp blade
as blood seeped out from the cut.
did it feel good?
are you happy now that you’ve made
a permanent scar that will forever showcase
how weak you are.
--I--
When I looked into its eyes, I saw darkness. Hurt. Pain. Anger. Sorrow. Grief. It gritted its teeth, and I leapt back.
"Please"
"Don't hurt me"
"Get back"
"Don't touch me"
Its eyes spoke these words loudly. It couldn't move. The trap was shut tightly around its leg. I left and returned with a plate. On the plate, I put a few raw meat pieces. It touched it but didn't eat anything. I returned to my house. From the window, I saw how it ate the meat. I repeated this a few times until it let me close enough.
I rescued it from the trap. For a moment it danced around from happiness. It leapt in the air and chased its tail. Then, in the next moment, it collapsed in the snow, red blood puddle increased from it. I kneeled beside it. For a second our eyes met, and I saw gratitude and relief. Then its eyes fell dark and never saw light again. I buried it the next morning.
This sad, momentary happiness left an impact on me. I rethought my life. About its life. Such short bliss I had given it. But still - I had given the fox its last moment of freedom. It had died as a free and happy animal.
Before I Remember
I shift and stir, untangling myself from the covers. The covers that kept me warm through the cold night are smothering me as room warms and the sun rises. There is a song playing in my head, and I am singing along to its melody. It escapes me the more it replays. I grasp at the scenes in my head. They come so quickly I can't tell if they are memories or dreams. I think I had a dream last night. But it disappears the moment I try to recall it.
My body is stiff and barely there. When I wake up, I don't know where I came from. My face is scrunched up and my eyes are too dry to open. I pull myself up and sit up on the side of my bed. My mind is loading like an old computer and my memories are waiting to be downloaded. I am just a body for now. No identity, no past, no memories. Please standby while your computer reloads. Time is paused, and I am at peace.
I open my eyes barely, gazing out at the door to my room. Any moment now.
Before I remember that those moments are past. That the sounds I've gotten so used to hear will never reach my ears again. The tiny, excited footsteps that have always come to wake me are just echoes in my mind. The sound of you greeting me excitedly as if you hadn't seen me in an eternity. The way you pounce on me, the first thing in the morning, to lick off any trace of dust on my face.
In my waking moments, there is a peace. Before I remember, you are somewhere I'll always miss.
Time Moves Slow
By the Lanterne Of Light
Asmodeus has long led Theia
in a waltz of sin
while shadows and flame
flicker a picture of life upon
bare stone walls
Yes, demons dance
Even darkness’ venerated prince
once brought light to a morning tango with her daughters
whose radiant smiles compete to
outshine the other
glimmering with hope to embody the next gleam in those fiery dawn eyes
Yes, demons dance
Even before stories and names
Oblivion devoured galaxies to seek the dizzying of light’s energy kinetic
Twirling and spinning
Entangled and swaying
In time
With the rhythm of a reality’s genesis
Oh, yes-
Demons dance
Headaches and Pain Killers
All I can feel as I sit in class is the throbbing of my head
It starts off small, just a small buh-duh-duh bum-diddly-duh buh-duh-duh
I smack the side of my head lightly, trying to make it go away
but that only makes it worse as the gentle pounding turns into hard rock drumming
The drummer not caring that my head is killing me and that I’m trying to concentrate
I can hear the drumming pounding within my heart even as my head keeps throbbing
It feels as if my head is on fire, thousands of hot needles stabbing into my forehead
Help, please, help, my head screams for mercy
Not able to take it anymore, I raise my hand to go to the nurse
The drumming continued as I walked down the hall
banging on my skull like it was a war drum and we were approaching the final battle
Hopefully this was one that I would actually win for once
After being given some ibuprofen, I swallowed the pills down like they were ambrosia
hoping that the godly nectar would soothe the pounding that would not stop ringing
Gradually the drumming stopped, the pounding eased
the pain in my forehead dulled to just a dull thud every five minutes
It was bliss in comparison to the drums
Too bad it was only a day before the war drums started up once more
#SleepySong
