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Comedy
Challenge Ended
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Ended February 15, 2021 • 34 Entries • Created by Harry_Situation
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Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for WhiteWolfe32
WhiteWolfe32 in Comedy
94 reads

“First” Date

As they ordered their food, Joe started the conversation with an icebreaker.

"Well, this is way more awkward than the last time we met."

Sally stared at Joe in shock.

This was a blind date.

She'd never seen him before in her life.

22
3
11
Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for ksilver
ksilver in Comedy
143 reads

Too Soon

Last March I went on my first date in four years. Instead of him sitting across from me, he put our chairs together, put his arm around me, and rested his hand on my leg. I told him affection and PDA give me anxiety. That was our only date.

22
4
1
Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for Camilla_Ferrand
Camilla_Ferrand in Comedy
152 reads

3 Strikes, You’re Out

"How was your meal?"

"Horrendous, last time I ask for a homecooked meal.”

“Didn’t I say dress formal?”

“I’ll have the stea-”

“She’ll have the salad, thanks.”

“Sorry?”

“Just looking out for your health, sweetheart.”

“If you want to look after yours, I suggest you let me order – sweetheart.”

22
7
5
Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for jtwannabewriter
jtwannabewriter in Comedy
85 reads

First Date Mistake.

“Whats that fragrance you’re wearing? It smells so familiar.” Pauses for a while in awkward silence. “You know? You smell like my mom.”

21
7
5
Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for Rob_Lee
Rob_Lee in Comedy
98 reads

How To Stay Single

"But I like older women."

(This is the watered down version - the first idea was filthy.)

"You look like a movie star in your profile pic... King Kong is my favourite film."

"You like my shirt? Thank you. Mummy chose well, didn't she?"

19
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5
Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Cover image for post EUH, by Mnezz
Profile avatar image for Mnezz
Mnezz in Comedy
65 reads

EUH

‘‘I know all about you from all your social accounts. I already ordered your favorite meal. The chicken fettucine alfredo! That one’s my favorite as well.’’

#EUH ©

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Ej1Kpv0WScw

15th Jan., 2021 Vendredi.

15
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7
Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for Danceinsilence
Danceinsilence in Comedy
90 reads

Odd Twist To Dinner

"Oh, glad you could find my place. Just have a seat on the sofa,

and I'll finish setting the table for dinner.

"What's that? Oh, what's for dinner?

"Didn't I telll you? You.

"I eat people."

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Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for Voidkin_Killer
Voidkin_Killer in Comedy
85 reads

Hm-?

(The first person who said they loved me!)

Him: Are you a vampire?

Me: Wtf-

It all unraveled after that.

((True story

13
3
5
Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for Jack_Chrono
Jack_Chrono in Comedy
37 reads

The best pickup line

"Are you a trainwreck? Because I just can't look away. Come on, whats that look for? At least I didnt call you a parking ticket!"

12
3
1
Challenge
Things you shouldn't say on your first date.
Write something that you shouldn't say on your first date. The most hilarious one wins.
Profile avatar image for TW
TW in Comedy
58 reads

Huh?

[overdressed city person] "Wow, you have a really neat accent. Where are you from?"

[confused resprouted hick] "...Ohio?"

12
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5