The sun had already set as she walked past the sandy shores, the wind blowing away her oversized red flannel shirt and pulling at her long, tangled hair, sending goosebumps down the bare legs draped only in a part of cotton shorts, a risky outfit for this kind of early Autumn weather. Not that she cared really, but rather welcomed it being the strange conundrum that she had been all her life.

She watched the sky as it still held some light in all its fading out-glory - turquoise green with a tint of blue shades, romancing away with deep blushing pinks - burning auburn oranges waiting to take over as soon as the night would lose its power to the dawn. She walked for what seemed like an endless journey - maybe it was an hour, maybe three, she wasn't sure. All that she knew was that she needed it; setting her mind into a more peaceful state that held place for her to write, or maybe even paint - she smiled at the thought.

The waves crashed softly against each other as they moved around with the powerful arms of the wind that seemed to want to have control over everything in its reach, moving to some peculiar yet beautiful kind of dance that was for her to witness. She smiled at the sight, at the same time feeling more goosebumps creep up her skin. Automatically, she wrapped the soft, worn-out shirt around her. And as she did so, she thought of the arms that always brought her warmth. She thought of the long fingers that intertwined around hers in a way that always left her lost for words. In the best possible way.

She looked up at the lights from the small houses and a few hotels spread around the beach and searched for the one place that actually mattered. All of them were beautiful, especially at a night like this, filled with the breathtaking spectacle provided by Mother Nature herself, filled with the wind, the waves, and with that one-of-a-kind breeze from the ocean. A combination that she could never resist, and never wanted to refuse. She looked up again and lifted her hand over her eyes, trying to see better through the darkness and the wind constantly pushing locks of her hair into her face. She squinted her eyes, concentrating, and smiled with relief as a small silhouette appeared in the distance, getting gradually bigger with each moment. A relief that could only appear in the presence of your home - that one person on earth meant only for you.

She ran up slightly, with a smile that held some guilt to it. The person lifted their hand in the air and waved it as if letting her know they were approaching. She watched the other woman shake her head as if being both amused and slightly annoyed - a famous combination for them both.

I thought you said, "Just one hour to clear my mind, just enough to not become crazier than usual". Wasn't that the agreement, woman? Or does one hour mean something a little different in your original, native tongue?

Okay, first of all, don't get smart with me. And second, what I said before was an assumption, darling. You know, I don't wear a watch.

Well, it's something that I'm still working on. I know that one day, I will make you see the right way.

She shakes her head but doesn't comment, instead she comes close and wraps an arm around her home, letting her hand move around her waist and rests her head on the other woman's chest. Listening to the symphony of a heart that brought her the most peace. Her love grumbles something under her breath, but holds her close in return.

Come on, let's get back before you catch a cold. I ordered some takeaway and opened a bottle of red, the one that you liked so much the last time around.

Well then. I expected punishment and a lecture. No bribery, darling.

Well, as you always say, "one does not stop the other".

That's fair.

She whispers and lets her love lead her back to their little beach house while the sky darkens its colors, deepening the turquoise and pink shade even more, shyly inviting bright points of light and reason to the spectacle, while a delicate crescent moon shows them the way back. She smiles at all the majestic beauty above her head and thanks the universe for the gift that it brought them. A gift that somehow always let them find their way back to each other. Each time for longer until reality became them always in skin's reach, at an arm's length, and close enough to feel the breath of one another when their souls would whisper the loudest. She watches as her love walks into their place, all lights already on, filling the space with warmth, showing off all the corners and surfaces that their love occupied so well, so naturally.

Just a beautiful, perfectly messy existence they accepted into their lives, something that they waited for what seemed like so many lifetimes. A blessing that they welcomed with gratitude that held no limits.

She takes one more look at the darkening skies now so graciously filled with stars, and inhales deeper as the wind intensifies, causing the waves to intensify their spectacular dance. She walks in with a smile.

Mmm, a storm coming? - Her love asks curiously.

It seems so.

Then we are definitely sleeping with the windows open in the bedroom.

As if there is any other way to do it right.

She smiles and massages the side of her neck, breathing in deeper and exhaling with something that fills her with a sense of rest and peace. Something that only comes from another soul, inside which you found your home. Someone who finally showed you that survival mode is not the only way to live.

With her, I find rest in my bones, rest that I never found before - a pause for the chaos always present in my body and mind. In her, I find someone that I can finally surrender to.

In the best possible way.

all I can hear in the back of my head

is the morally grey

and terms of endearment spelled b a c k w a r d s

( mirrored in a fractured frame )

it's like the scratch of a needle against the same record

played way too many times

the terms of endearment

never sounded so strange

and out of place,

like they sound now, e c h o i n g in my brain

as the rusty needle tries to play the same

c h e e r y

tone once again

- Anna Rose

I am on soul withdrawal

yet I don't ever plan on being fully sober again

sitting in an AA meeting in a smoke-filled room

in the universe's waiting room,

cheap coffee, folded chairs

and no air

you, my dear

are a frosted glass of cursive lines

a shot of tequila served chilled

( crisp, fresh,

and with my favourite kind of twist )

I am on soul withdrawal for now

but I was made for decades

of being soul drunk on you

my fingers itch for you

they itch to open the bottle once more

______________

music vibes: Ashley Monroe - "Hands On You"

to say that I...

that I miss

that I crave

that I need

YOU

is to say nothing at all,

to say that I...

that I starve to my last nerve

that I perish to dust from thirst

that I ache in places I didn't know that even existed

to say that... oh that's... hmm... is barely touching the surface

I can't even say that my bones only hurt

no

they itch

they scratch

they flame up

FOR YOU

and my skin... it's indescribable

these muscles, this skin, these fingertips

all of that

wants to wrap itself around you

oh love

this heart already beats inside of yours

and this soul

this reckless,

tide stirred and ocean deep

fire-infused soul of mine

is shamelessly tattooed against your fragile collarbone

that collarbone

dripping with honey

salt

and just lightly burned caramel

___________

mmm you are both the mind, and the body high

music inspiration - Jaymes Young - Tied Down

my own personalized brand of heroin

someone once said,

and I found it so true

I feel it right to my bones

whenever we are in the same room

I inhale her deeply

right to my bloodstream

her scent so good

warm

fiery

addicting

and coating my soul

as I taste it

right of the inside of her wrist

the sweetest spot that could ever be

it seems to always hold her essence the most

often even more than her lips,

though those as well

I could never really resist

she calls to me

she whispers under my skin

she is the cosmic dust

my sweetest addiction

without the downfall,

without the crash

my own personalized brand of heroin

someone once said,

you are the drug, the dealer and redemption in one

not a downfall but a match to my soul, a spark that ignites

this human in me

a home carved into passion

and love

into the sweetest surrender

pepper kisses, on honey-salted lips

( on the petal soft skin )

pepper kisses on hands that always want to be touched

pepper kisses on the forehead

that whisper

"you are safe with me"

the sun and the moon

are the big two

on the endless sky above our heads

they meet every year but they never touch

sharing warmth and light

with the vaguest of caress

now you and me...

we are just their descendants

that not only get to collide

in each others spheres

but also love, touch, and stay

we get to make a home

in each others hearts

in each others souls

in our bodies that constantly crave one another ,

I am a moon child of a summer's night, my dear

colored with stormy seas

and wildflowers on my lips ,

and you are Apollo's favorite daughter

made of amber

chocolate and honey hues

a warrior of many battles

and a protector like me,

your embrace matches mine, Apollo's child

and my moonlit fingers

intertwin perfectly with yours

my love,

in the end we are not solely our parents

we are our own

a brand new light and warmth

that deserves to be loved

my stormy oceans call upon you

and can only rest among

your universe's vast amber hues

once upon a time

I was just a hollow tree

I was both the empty space ,

and the wind that danced between the fractured trunk

a home once so full of life

now

completely abandoned

with just echoes remaining

( small sounds

to fill the existence around me )

the wind was singing to me

but I had no strength in my arms to cradle it

oh how much I wanted

to keep it warm

but there was no heat in me to give

We are the only Sun and the Moon that collide into each other

an eclipse that lasts a lifetime

( infinite lifetimes blend into a tapastry of the univers's design

and shared with you, my love )

it is one of my heart's desire

to be nestled into you without end

for I am the warmest there

filled with the most calm

being by your side has found me in surrender

and it was one of the rare moments

in my life

that I had NO reason to fight

and maybe I had said it way too many times

(perhaps)

but surrendering to you... to us

in those moments when I lay by your side

it always has the same flavor

the same taste

somehow, it always feels like coming back home