In the gentle cradle of her arms,

A world of love and endless charms.

with whispers soft and tender grace,

She guides her child through time & space.

Her heart

a lighthouse in the dark,

Illuminates with purest light.

Through laughter shared and tears that fall,

She stands unwavering,

strong and tall.

A tapestry of dreams she weaves,

In every heartbeat,

every breath she breathes.

Motherhood

a sacred song

In every verse,

she belongs.

Who would’ve thought

The storm that broke me

has paved the way to my growth

Finally,

I’ve found my own rhythm and flow

Through the chaos and pain,

A strength was reborn,

In the depths of despair,

A new light was born.

The tempest that once shattered,

now breathes my name,

In its fierce, untamed clatter,

I found a new flame

In shadows deep,

my heart would hide,

A fortress strong,

where none could bide.

Yet in the light, I found my truth,

A tender soul, a gentle youth.

Through trials faced,

my walls did fall,

Revealing cracks, a fragile call.

In vulnerability, I found my grace,

A heart laid bare, in love’s embrace.

And in that moment,

It was beautiful

as beautiful as it was going to get

But just like the seasons

We too couldn’t out run the rain

Grey clouds stormed over us

and in the rain we’ve been

This storm may never end

even when the sun shines, it drizzles

Soon after it pours …

I dive into the album of us

Just to reminisce,

Those captured moments

guide me through the days we spent

It’s crazy to think

Our sanctuary of hope

How quickly did it become cold

You’ve ever felt numb?

without the drugs…

A feeling of time passing you by

and its going so fast

you can barely keep up

you look all around you

and everyone’s moved on

they’ve forgotten your loss

your hurt

the pain and trauma

they have expectations now

they want you to move on

“smile and be happy because this life is only one

appreciate what you have

and remember

everything happens for a reason

and what happened was meant to happen“

and you want to defend yourself

but the words don’t always come out

you’re so angry but the words never leave your mouth

The nerve of people thinking they know what you deserve

what happiness you’re meant to have

what hurt you can’t move on from

and you just stand there

quiet, defenseless… numb …

You are my peace which have made me more sane

You are the sun who made my rainy days fade away

You are the strength that enhanced my potential in every right state

You are the reason why my doubts have parted ways

You are my backbone

a kind of shield

when ever I needed to be healed

You’ve isolated my darkness

Shining bright ’till my shadow drifted into haze

You’ve given me true happiness

Something I’ve never really obtained

Its something I wouldn’t want to replace

We are a team, we are one,

You are my everything

& above it all

The one !

Inhale

Exhale

Take a deep breath

Stormy days will come to an end

Remember God wouldn’t give you

nothing you couldn’t take

Sunshine is on its way

See the beauty through it all

It could’ve been worse

But why wasn’t it better?

It could’ve been worse

but it could’ve been better

Am I still grateful?

Should I still feel whole

Lately I’ve just been feeling empty

I’m at my lowest

and I’m trying my hardest to stay put

but if you medicate you’re defined to be crazy

If you seek council you seek attention

The way I see it

If you ask for help you’ve become a burden

either way you put it you’ll be judged…

writing this while Dion was still here

and rereading it I get all the same feels

10x worse, much more intense

I always said we will get through this

but I always imagined it with you by my side at the end of it all

a long life ahead of you

with much more happy days ahead

I just wanted a chance to make you happy

and now it is I

who have to make myself happy again

but how.. with what?

this damage can not be undone

this hurt can not be fought

I lost you and now I have to live

with the what if’s and could be

for the rest of my life

you‘re gone with no return

and now here I stand

Golden brown curls

big curved brown eyes

with so much expression beyond his sight

beautiful flared nose

Followed by his full pink lips

That sun kissed skin

and don’t get me started on his cute little fits

trying to fill our silent air

I just love the time we spend

You fill me up with so many emotions

You’ve filled all the void I once knew

When I wake up

I am anxious to get to you

and before I fall asleep

I pray for your homecoming to be soon

I love you with every cell in my body

every inch of my heart

If we could trade places

I promise I would,

from the very start

This has been no easy journey

but for as long as you’re here

This trip will all just be a worthy memory

A prayer will do

Attracting the positive will prove

Meditation should soothe

Distraction is how you’ll handle your truth

Trust me the voices say

It worked for me, trust me, I’m proof

It all sounds easy when you’re the one preaching

It all seems simple when you’re not the one bleeding

You can’t feel what you don’t know

Trust me, I’m proof!