The tarantism of her broken heart

Invading the dance floor

With her rhythmic art

A cry in each move

A weep in each groove

Leaving the pain on the dance floor

The sad beats of her heart

Something even the music can adore

Dancing all wildly

With nothing to prove

That break up two step

With nothing to lose

Switching the side of her phone

Do not disturb her line

Healing hurt feelings

Enjoying her time

Hidden angel

Are you with me

Wherever I go

I can feel you

With my eyes close

So I meditate

Especially when I’m down

You say hold your head up Baby

Elevate your crown

When I’m crying

You say darling don’t make a sound

Because although I’m no longer physically around

I will always be around

You’re so ubiquitous

Mysterious

You’re everywhere at once

In the stars the sun and moon

It hurts to know you left so soon

But I know there’s no time for sadness

Or gloom

there’s so much things

Left here for me to do

I know my life still matters

And even in your physical absence

Your life will always matter

My beautiful hidden angel

I’m glad you’re with me wherever I go

And I know you’re watching me as I grow

And it’s beautiful to know that you’ll always be with me

And everyone that you know

Eyes closed

Mind open

Meditating

To keep my heart focused

meditating to get my zen

Flowing

Afterwards

Glancing in the mirror

To catch my skin glowing

Lighting candles

To get the light going

Got my scenes growing

Orange colors in my aura

Positive words in my Montra

“Tay stay present “

Always remember each day is a blessing

Always remember each day has a lesson

Gotta keep meditating for my protection

Have to stop insulting the old me

By disrespecting the new me

Been allowing my new self

To go back on the boundaries

That my old heart set out for me

bringing noise to my peaceful mentality

Heartbreak is the new norm for me

The old me says hey

I didn’t teach you these ways

Remember before we said ...

we were turning that page

No longer living that way

Remember lighting candles

Meditating

The new her is giving our energy away

She’s even forgetting to pray

Famished soul

Desperate for her heart to feed

Walking the path forgetting I have

My own very self to lead

Me

What if the old and the new me

Merged into one

Tolerating disrespect from absolutely no one

So far fetch

Like a joke with no pun

A sky with no sun

The old me let go of a lot of bad habits

And I’ll be damned if the new me

Sashays into this new season

With no motive but to sabotage it

If this house had a mouth

Tell me ..

what would she say,

Would her words,

paint vivid pictures ..

Of my most wicked days?

An unruly movie of my kept secret ways,

How liquid,

my solid demeanor

gets ..

when my son is away.

All the things

I say to God

when I lay down and pray,

When I cursed him for taking my loved one away...

Or when I thanked him

for blessing me

with a peaceful soulmate,

Crazy how I knew you

right out the gate

Searching deep in my memory

Like how do I know his face

Finding my sunshine in the darkest of days,

Second guessing you cus there’s just simply no way...

I can love you already for a lifetime of days,

you entered into my house

Who has so much to say

And I hope you don’t leave me

when the movie

begins to play.

I’ll admit that I ain’t perfect

I been insecure for years

It’s a very low feeling

To think that you are worthless

Groomed to think this way since age 3

Looking in the mirror never really liking

What I see

Wondering if God made a mistake on me

Giving birth to a beautiful blessing

And his father can’t even see the worth in me

Giving every person my all

Still they walk away from me

Or do I push them out

The picture is never clear to me

Pinned up resentment turns into

Built up anger

Which turns into mental danger

Danger for anyone who deals with me

Loves on me

Always looking for my exit out

Before someone else abandons me

Fighting when I know there can never be a victory

Cus the battle isn’t with you

It’s inside of me

It haunts me

Taunts me

Look at your self

Pretty perfect picture

But how can someone love you

When you have no inner wealth

Everyday losing grip on your mental health

Wonder if I told anyone how I really felt

Would it really help

So I just keep it to myself

Until every once in a while

I gotta let my demons out

Now I’m looking crazy

My decision making gets a little hazey

Feeling like if I was someone else

I probably wouldn’t even date me

I don’t know man this just how I been feeling lately

Or should I say

This just how I been feeling daily.

I have to ask

If I told you I still loved you

Can we remove the book mark from our past

If we tried again can we make things last

When we broke up

It happened so fast

Now it’s ship wrecked

The waves reached us

Hate feels so good when you don’t mean it,

Filling up my plate

but i won’t eat it,

Famished love,

Leave me alone,

let me hate you in peace,

Don’t come back,

Grief.

Morning this break up when we never had a title,

Lover turned to rival,

Happy turned to spiteful..

I’m not!

gonna give in this time,

Can’t get away

you gotta pay this fine

You gotta let me Pine

Over you...

I wanna be over you

I wanna let go of you

I wanna murder you

My bad

I’m Just kidding

But I do wanna bury you

In my heart

Rest in dark

I played my part

I fell apart

Now what

What’s left

You crafty motherfucker

You did it real good

You fucked me real good

You hurt me real good

Peace is so hard to find

When you resting in that chaos

I wanted to help you out

Wanted to get you out

Now you just out

And I’m out

Out of your life

and this time when I say i say it

You know those 3 words ..

I hate you ..

I really do mean it.

I lost you

Abruptly

It hurt me

Instantly

I lost me

Inadvertently

I lost you and lost me

Simultaneously

My nana dear

I miss you being here

The same year I lost you

Is the same year I found me

Because I had him on the first

The first of the year

And God made it clear

That I would have a happy new year

My son was born

The same year I lost you

So the words ring true

The same year i lost you

I found myself to

I am a mom

I say this calm

With much charm

I was lost now I’m found

And even though you’re not around

You’re still teaching me lessons

The same year I lost you

I gave birth to a blessing

Poetic license to kill,

Do I have a license to thrill?

Thrill you with my rhymes,

It’s only a matter of time,

Before you fall in line,

Reading in between my lines,

Sounding off like chimes,

Metaphors galore,

Can’t hold back anymore,

You like my stanzas and flow,

Poets glow,

You gotta know,

Because we see the world differently,

We articulate it free flowingly,

Don’t get to close to me,

When I got my pen and paper out,

The way I pull this all together will ..

shock you without a doubt,

Because I’ll give myself the license,

The poetic license to kill,

Just give me the leisure to thrill,

Thrill you with my rhymes,

It’s only a matter of time before you fall in line.

Broken pieces

Of my heart

Pulling light out

the dark

Where’s the spark

That we once had

Feels so bad to be this sad

I tried again ...

you know that thing

I said I wouldn’t do

Yea that’s right I came back to you

Now I’m broken

Into pieces

Shattered glass

can’t compare

Full of sadness

and despair

You don’t care

You’re unaware

I wish this pain

was something we could share