I hope and pray every day that I might finally be free from you. I live in the brightest of daylight and smiles. It is always a glorious day. But, as is always the case there is no escape until you free yourself. The days are long and bright, but the night descends and brings with it solitude. The poverty of people, excepting myself. My thoughts, and nothing more. I find myself alone.

The thoughts flood into my brain as the sun fades into the horizon. I remember everything. All the memories, pain and otherwise. Whether I want to or not. And they yell, loud as a banshee; loud as a hawk descending on its prey. And no matter how weighted the blanket, or tight I curl myself up I cannot escape. No amount of running or riding. No car, nor horse can carry me far enough from myself to escape.

And although you are the one in a cage, I’m the one whose trapped.

My friend, I love you as you love me

But that's only from what you can see

What lies below is not so mellow,

that much is sure my dearest fellow.

For now I tell you that I'm sure you can't

stomach the truest of me if I grant

you a view, into the deepest part of my soul

in a lane as dark and icy as the north pole

So, my friend you please don't take offence

I do want to trust you, and you are not dense

But the self that I hide in my soul, on a hummoch

Is on some days more than even I can stomach

When I feel really sad, I find

that I may just as well be blind

For I often don’t notice or fail to see

All those who say that they love me

Although I sometimes dont think they lie

I cannot let that chance go by

To give my trust, and have it broke,

by someone who really wants me to choke

So what I do, to feel much better

Is sit at a table and write a letter

And leave it to my favourite friend

That he can read in the end

I cheer myself up, I grab my favourite tie

And wave my family goodbye

My dolls, in warm clothes I do swathe

Get on a chair and take a leap of faith

I scream,

a scream so loud

a scream inarguably audible

a scream, so painful

And yet,

no one hears it

it seems so quiet to them

or mabye they are just deaf

And yet I keep screaming,

till the tears come down to shush the sounds

and I go back

to sipping my coffee staring at the reason I screamed at all

with a shaking smile

Love is like a raindrop

It falls upon you during the darkest and grayest of days

Falling into the hearts of those who expect it least with a plop

And rolls into the tiniest crevices of the heart in its own ways.

You open an umbrella in an attempt to avoid it

And cover it over your heart to block the gentle patter

But it falls anyway, disregarding your jokingly sad wit

Plopping on your defences, eroding them untill they shatter

Despite the rain’s passing, and your own self-sorrow

You’ll end up in love, looking forward to tomorrow

Oh how I long to see you burn in hell,

For all the pain and suffering you caused

You took it all and left me standing there

Alone and broke of all but my own hate

There was never a man who yearned as I

For the sweet feeling of your blood on hand

That may not be washed off by men or gods

For my hate runs deeper than any can feel

But yet I now wish that I had not done

The most awful deed that ever could have been

Oh what I wouldn’t give to have you here

So that I could kill you all again now

Alas for now you are gone but still alive

Through my own vengeful hate and memory