I was never a person to you.

I was a sensation;

An easy high,

A distraction from life,

An excuse to get out of the house.

I was something for you to hold —

A stress relief ball.

I was a viewer on your live-streams

And a compliment jar.

The only thoughts that mattered

Were the ones about you.

You’re a king

Sitting on a thrown of pity.

I was your loyal subject,

One of many.

That’s what I was to you.

I knew you were no good,

A mix of immaturity and toxicity,

It’s not your fault,

You’re the product of a fucked society,

Succumbing to addiction,

Numbness is better than crying in silence,

But you only drink when you want to die,

It’s only preventative in that you won’t live a long life.

As my health went downhill, excursions outside the house got fewer and fewer, then stopped altogether — except for visits to doctors and hospitals.

What did I miss most? Family and church. Fortunately, FaceTime connected me with my kids and grandkids as well as my church's monthly Men’s Breakfast.

Losing 50-pounds gave me confidence to go out. One of my first stops: Men’s Breakfast — a joyful day. Even bigger was my return to 1st Baptist-Elfers for a Sunday service.

Pastor Jim Prose’s message that day was “He Is Worthy Because He Is Holy,” from Isaiah 6:1-9, which includes, “Here am I! Send me,” words that resonated in my soul.

After the altar call, I went forward—not to become a Christian (did that in Vietnam) but rather to affirm the goodness of God in granting me grace to retreat from the brink of weighing nearly 400 pounds.

Why share this spiritual stuff? 1 Cor. 6:19-20 puts it best: “Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit...”

Bottom line: I was given the gift of a healthy body and squandered it. I’m hopin’ to help keep others from making that mistake.

Strange how I’m attached to this lighter

It served me well, my old friend

But I won’t be needing you anymore

Your job is done

Fare thee well dear lighter

I hope your being happiness to someone new

As you did to me

Flint and steel

Beer and cigarettes

One and the same I believe

Have you seen “Karate Kid”? Great movie. My favorite scene is when Daniel-san learns how to shine Mr. Miyagi’s car: “Wax on. Wax off. Don’t forget to breathe.” I thought of that recently when I stepped from my writing room into the kitchen. As my foot hit the floor, I had a disconcerting moment. What happened? My big boy pants slipped unceremoniously from my waist to my ankles: “Pants on. Pants off.”

Normally that would have been embarrassing, even though nobody was home. But now I classify it as an NSV.

Question One: What does NSV stand for? Non-Scale Victory.

Question Two: What’s a Non-Scale Victory? Something truly wonderful.

Let me elaborate.

When I started my health journey back in December, a friend cautioned me not to get pre-occupied with weigh-ins. Why? She said weight was only part of the success equation.

That’s when she alerted me to NSVs.

For example, a year ago I could not get my shoes on because I weighed nearly 400 pounds and my feet were swollen. Once I lost weight and my feet got un-swelled, I was able to put on shoes. Might not seem like a big deal, but (trust me) it was. That’s a Non-Scale Victory.

Need another example?

OK. How about this: During the few times I left the house last year, it took two people (the driver and I) to get my safety belt into the lock position. By the time we heard “click,” I was huffin’ and puffin’ with chest pains. Now, I “click” by myself.

Need more?

Couldn’t get into regular pants last year. Had to wear those stretchy things with a thick string around the belly that needed to be tied into a loopy-loop, like a knot on your shoe. Now? Recently got a brand new pair of regular pants—belt and all.

But let’s get back to the “pants on-pants off” incident. Standing there, with one foot in my writing room and another in the kitchen, was a metaphor for my ongoing transformation—like when a caterpillar sheds its cocoon to become a butterfly.

What about you? Are you taking care of yourself? You should. I waited until age 71 to get healthy. (It’s a miracle I survived that long.) My big regret is that I didn’t start sooner.

Sure, I’ve given up stuff — like pizza, pasta, potatoes, cake, and cookies. But I’ve gained something, too: the chance to see my grandkids graduate from high school. Seems like a great trade-off to me.

How about you?

I’m not talkin’ about dieting. (Been there; done that.) I’m talking about a genuine paradign shift — from Twinkies & Snickers to lean and green.

Is is worth it? It has been so far. (I’ve lost 60 pounds since December, and feel much better.)

All I’m sayin’ is, “Think about it.”

What have you to got to lose? Weight for one thing. What have to got to gain? Health, for starters — and a whole new adventure in living.

“

Will you change the way

You treat me after

Hearing the story of my past?

”