Deep breath. Hold it. Now, release slowly. Do that a few more times. Take a moment to notice the cool of the wooden floor under your naked feet. Look up at the sliver of sky between the shades. What shade of blue is it? Can you hear the birdsong? The traffic outside of the window? Are people walking by? Stay present.

It was just a nightmare. Remnant of the fleeting thoughts before unconsciousness. The past...

White walls. Pale grey tiles on concrete. Painting of Saturn Devouring His Son.

As I draw closer, the lights dim. Only the painting is highlighted. Only the painting grows.

Life-size, the scene. What is it about his eyes that look at me as if I'm known? Eyes aware of the atrocity and yet unrepentant?

I'm cold. From head to toe, yes, but my heart also feels nothing. As if the act of eating the body is commonplace. His body is still warm. His blood drools down my chin. I think of his acts as I exact my brand of justice...

"You're not welcomed here."

"Where better? You doubt."

"Your lies distract me!"

"You are of two minds."

"I'll be rid of you!"

"You're the one that called."

"I merely wrestle - "

"With your worldliness."

"I'm only human."

"That is prone to fail"

"Get away from me!"

"How will you make me?"

"Through sheer force of will."

"You cannot be still."

"Heaven, please help me!"

"It doesn't exist."

"It's you I'll resist."

"And though you may rage-"

"Get away from me!"

"-already engaged."

"Let me set the stage."

"This is sacrilege!"

"I'll visit your dreams,

where you lose control

and possess your soul."

I'm so glad that cat died!

Always scratching my leaves.

Leave well enough alone.

Had a surprise for her.

She don't know I'm toxic.

That's right! Scratch and nibble...

My 89 year old mom

cooking breakfast

for the both of us,

The cozy living room

where we watch her shows

while sipping coffee,

The hug at the door

at the end of the day

and her, "God bless you."

Inaudible as the message was,

that information was being shared

served as a comfort and we waited

for the clarification coming,

but the seconds turned to long minutes

becoming in us a helplessness

that drove us to a point of madness

and of one accord, we became Death.

All but the conductor was rescued.

During the downpour,

at the aftermath,

buried in the mire,

drowning in my bile,

semiconsciously

I begin to float

into the abyss

immediately

surrounded by ghosts

and their tales of woes.

The final flicker

blows away all hope

and I, plummeting,

become a puppet

at the mercy of

my depravities...

The door was opened,

no one knows by whom,

when or even why,

but so it remains,

allowing access

to the spiritual.

Had we forgotten,

distracted ourselves,

we may have survived.

Alas, we're all flawed,

easily mastered

by depravity.

Brutal, "I love you,"

hours of neglect

and all the grooming

have had a hand

in my decision

to become humane.

Letting my guard down,

I offered you me.

My expectations

were of unity,

and of forevers -

romantic notion,

antiquated, that

may soon meet its end

should self-centeredness

continue to spread.