I look around
"Keep your head to the ground."
I keep my head raised
Trying to be unfazed
"They're all staring at you."
I know it's untrue
"They're all laughing."
At this point it's attacking
My heart pounds from stress
"You need to get out of this mess."
I am frozen in place
"At least hide your ugly face."
My face feels hot
But I can't leave the spot
"You don't belong in society."
This is my Social Anxiety
I love puns! I love the simplicity of the the word play. I especially love puns when they are paired with visuals. For example, I love you from my head to-ma-toes, with a picture of a cute tomato! Now, do I think they are the funniest thing ever? Honestly, no. I think the reaction it elicits from others is the funny part. When told a pun, people usually react with a sigh and a slight giggle which is the funny part. But puns in and of themselves are not very funny.
I wish I could turn back time
I wish I could bring him back
I wish I could say everything will be okay
I wish I could take away the pain
I wish I could heal you heart with words
I wish I could hold it together for you
I wish I wasn't ready to break
I wish I was stronger
I am not
I wish I wasn't there that night
I miss your dad too
Everyone But Me
They depend on me to teach them what they need to know.
They depend on me to identify when they need help with anything.
They don't understand how mentally exhausted I am becoming.
They look to me for council.
They look to me for a shoulder to cry on.
They don't ask me how I am doing.
They say I am the rock.
They say I hold it all together.
They don't see the small cracks beginning to form.
My fire for life has began to burn dim.
I can think of no reason for myself.
I live for other people.
I’m Doing Great
I lie because there are no true words to describe the feelings in my soul.
No words to describe the tremendous amount of anxiety and fear I hold in my heart.
No words to tell of my over whelming sadness.
No words to explain that these feelings overtook me.
I lie because my face doesn’t match my soul.
I lie because I don’t want to be a burden.
I’m doing great.
*Recently, I have been having the worst anxiety, and writing about it and acknowleging that it is there helps immensley. Everytime I look at this short piece, it helps calm me a little bit.*