I hear your call again

weaving its way

through the lonely silhouettes of night

like a shadow bringing words and song,

the winds of darkness,

a bird soaring with midnight wings.

You flutter through black forests

over moonlight rivers

beneath the twinkling stars,

sparking creativity

that cracks the hollow hours

with blazes of white lightning,

but I’m afraid you come and go

like the fleeting seasons

and now it’s silent white winter.

Persephone has retreated,

Orpheus sings his song to Hades,

and you’ve joined Eurydice in the darkness,

and I realize the hard truth:

there is no one for me but you

and you will never be mine.

Sounds fill the air

with circles of swirling sonic splendor,

spinning with barrages of notes

that send the heart into a frenzy,

numbing the mind with pleasure,

rhythm pulses passion

in squares and rectangles

of galloping thumping thuds,

parallel to the beats of the heart

sending the body into movement,

music engulfs the body

in the sideways eight of infinity,

vibrating and blanketing,

pounding and elevating

to the stars and ellipses

of orbit.

When you feel the music

slide into you

like a wave of warm air

on a frigid night

and your mind opens to the divine,

a splash of light and pleasure

that overwhelms you

and fills you with a blaze of energy,

when the drugs hit

and your mind leaves you alone

with waves of ecstasy

running through your numbed body

like electric fingers

caressing your back, your mind

and lighting an inner fire,

a flare of fiery life,

when the sex is amazing

with a beautiful woman

smile like a sunrise, hair like a waterfall,

ass like the sweetest candy,

and she knows all the tricks and can go all night

and you’re filled with blazing pleasure,

nuclear passion

that sends you into the stratosphere,

you leave your body

and join with the divine,

that collective pleasure,

universal light

that rains down from Heaven

in sunbeams and disco ball flashes,

sending your soul

back where it belongs.

I can’t love.

My mind is a mess

of twisted thoughts

I’ve shaped over the years

to help me do

what I thought I was supposed to do,

to help me say

what I thought I was supposed to say.

Someone said hi,

I said hi back.

Someone said I love you,

I said I love you back

because I thought

that’s what I was supposed to do.

I always waited

for the woman to climax

because I thought that was

what I was supposed to do.

The polite thing to do.

But my heart

is this sunken hidden thing

I don’t think I have access to

underneath all these thoughts

twisted like a mess of spaghetti,

twisted by my need to fit in,

by my need to attempt

to be human.

In the beginning, there were two lovers

locked in eternal embrace

and they dreamed of stars and super novas

alone in the dark of space.

The male pulled away in order to see

his lover in full view,

but as he gazed upon her beauty,

the winds of darkness blew,

and death with his pure lack of mercy

struck with deadly haste,

stealing the male’s ever-living soul,

leaving his body to waste.

The universal mother,

struck with maddening grief,

gave birth to all that is

a universe beyond belief

with planets, stars, comets, suns,

expanding out away,

with gods and spirits, angels and demons,

and lords of night and day.

All the dreams she and her lover dreamed

became real and new,

as there she stayed, an unmoving center

from which everything grew,

and as the mother watched with sorrow

as her children drifted out,

always moving further from her,

closer to death and doubt,

her sadness, guilt, grief and suffering

encompassed everything

with death and darkness surrounding all

ever looming, ever waiting.