It's taken a while

It's been a bit hard

I've needed some help

But I've finally found myself

God sent me His love

He gave me some songs

He sent me some friends

And He's helped me along

I can finally say that I've found myself

I can love each piece of me

Even if it's not every day

I've been helped and I can find a way

I've always been the "good kid"

The one that parents like

Don't cause problems, don't make trouble

I'll be the peacemaker

I sit in the middle

I keep my head down

Eyes closed, ears open

Bear through the pain or discomfort for harmony

Just sit and listen

Be quiet, keep still, and try to make people proud

That's all you gotta do if you want to be the "good kid"

Really not that much but it starts to bear down

It's not all that great

I keep secrets and overhear them

I'm barely holding it together

The "good kid" stuff never stops

The world beats and pushes and breaks

They snap you over and pull out the stakes

With dirt below and clouds overhead

The world on accident makes sure you're dead

But He'll pull you out and help you see

What the world around won't let you be

You can be inspiring intelligent and kind

You and He can have an unbreakable bind

If only you treat those around with love

He'll teach you what it's like above

God and the world are not the same

He's just and has grace and love unfeigned

He'll give you peace and a kinder heart

If only you ask and give a sincere part

Our father above can handle all things

As long as you let Him and give Him the reins

Getting ready for the day is always a hassle, we can all agree on that. Wake up, get dressed, brush teeth, eat breakfast, leave for school/work. So, why was it different this time? Ryker went through all the motions but somehow it- meant something now. Fall is finally arriving and the leaves are changing and dying. It's not a sad death though. It is

more like a re-birth, see, the leaves fall and land on the ground, and when they decompose the

tree uses that nutrients to grow and flourish. Before, getting ready for the day to Ryker meant getting ready to do the same thing over again as yesterday. Eventually, he got tired of it and turned to his friend Google for suggestions on how to make life more interesting. One of the first things that popped up was consciously being kind to people all day. Okay simple task. Our friend woke up and made an extra piece of toast for his brother's breakfast before school. He said hi to people who were normally overlooked in the halls. Once back home he played with his little sister more willingly than usual. Done, checked off the list. Next was to do something different, no matter how small, each day than the day before. Something changeable in Ryker's routine... why not use a different toothbrush, then wear a hat to work, then on and on.

About a month after keeping up with a bunch of those habits Ryker woke up to his alarm and was excited? Maybe not excited but definitely something other than the usual dismal feeling. It meant something to him now, to wake up and not be in pain like some people, to wake up and be able to get ready and accomplish things without help. It is definitely not a big change, no definitely not, but it's a start to living, rather than simply surviving.