Humanity 

I love you so

I discover you in

my reflections

All around

conditioned souls

patience awaits in

life's directions

If I could take you

Humanity -

hold you long

into the night

We'd watch the lessons

to be learnt,

witness dawning

of new light

Humanity if I could

rock you so

learning what it means

to forgive

I 'd sing forgiveness in

a lullaby

within the chorus

learn to live

Humanity

You beat the drum

the rhythm holds

promise to discover

Empathy lost and

new love found

to make life itself

our lover

A single tear 

rolls down my cheek

thinking of you

in goodbyes,

parting ways

I dared not speak

darkness

offers brand new light.

Nothing shall

remain the same

connection is

so brief,

Together riding

along the plane

never venturing

underneath.

We pushed we tried

with all our might

both knowing

all was lost.

A single moment

was our plight

love given

at no cost.

As the tear

is swept away

within the gentle

evening air,

acknowledging

the lessons taught

stripping my

soul to bare.

Did you know that Love and Fear used to be lovers? 

Oh yes, it was so long ago now. These days we can only see the cinematic love saga of the two if we learn to study the whispers of time passed.

The story however, lived on.

Love and Fear had been sweethearts from even before the beginnings of time. Encapsulating each others desires in every heartbeat, every breath. Together they existed only to provide lashings of kindness, adulation, tenderness and devotion to each other, for nothing else was needed.

Together they were, the balancing scales, the cream on the cake, pleasure laden bliss, cool to the hot, stillness in the breeze, sun to the snow and ebb to the flow. They were the one in oneness.

Love and Fear epitomised unity.

Well, that was until they had a visitor from a faraway land. His name was Consciousness and he was a sneaky game playing intruder! He came with gifts.

‘I’ve truckloads full of thought,’ he said, ‘endless internal chatter, armfuls of entanglement, and Minds for the masses. Free for all, don’t get left behind, take a Mind for yourself, experience the limitations of LIFE. These minds are solar powered and no shut-off switch. They were designed to think, think, think. Twenty-four seven - think!’

Consciousness gifted a mind to Love. Gifted a mind to Fear. Unwittingly they accepted as Consciousness went on his merry way, singing - -

’The power will be mine

my force is too strong,

Fear and Love will never

know my secret song.

Their new minds shall win

unending thought will begin,

as I slip into the folds

of eternity’s din.’

Love and Fear naively accepted his gifts and immediately switched on their new minds. At first they felt them to be a novelty. For, they felt their emotions expand, blossom, they could now engage their senses, they played games with each other endlessly, they experienced as they made love in the flesh for the first time. Oh, the sweetest of pleasures exchanged!

Soon though, they became tired and irritable. They wished to turn off their minds. But they simply could not. This new thought in mind just would not cease!

‘Just be sure you are ready to switch your minds on,’ Consciousness had said, ‘for there is no shut-off switch.’

Fear’s new mind introduced him to anger when he had reached sensory overload. Anger ravenously gained control over him. Anger, in a fit of rage, exploded with screaming, kicking and punching at all within sight.

Love had never seen Fear in such a state. She was unable to calm him he and became frightened. FRIGHTENED! Another new emotion she had to endure. Love didn’t know what to do or how to help. Fear, totally consumed by Anger launched an attack of irrational venting onto Love. Fear was out of control.

Love, having never ever experienced anger, was at a loss for what to do.

Days and weeks passed and Fear’s rage continued to fire. Fear was no longer the one Love had given her heart too. Fear was becoming violent. His new mind was getting the better of him, angry thoughts led the way. Love felt she had lost her darling Fear forever. She had no choice but to leave, and quickly, before her did her harm.

Having a new mind affected Love as well. Before mind, her outpouring of perpetual devotion for Fear was consummate. Nothing else mattered. Her existence had been unfettered and Love had always found herself hovering in a state of bliss. But now, with mind, she had discovered complications, she had discovered desire for more. Love was out of check and out of balance. She did not like it one little bit. Her life force always had the ability to heal all and everything in her and Fear’s existence. But now, she was weak, the mind in constant thought no longer allowed her to emit beauty unending.

Unable to help Fear and with a heart filled with sorrow, Love left Fear in the dead of the night. She was going in search of Consciousness, she needed to return his gift of mind.

After Consciousness had gifted the first two minds to Love and Fear he continued on his journey offering gifts of the miracles of mind to all in his path. It did not take long for thought to pop up everywhere in his wake. An ethnosphere was forming. Starting out like a spiders web, soon thought became entangled and existence began to get confusing.

On her journey, Love found herself becoming caught up in the entanglement of thought from many directions, not just her own thought anymore, but now, new, fresh thought was being fired at her in every direction. Oftentimes Love would lapse, forgetting why she had set out in the first place. It was not until she had examined the deep recesses of her mind that she remembered she was doing it for her beloved other-half, Fear.

If only she could find Consciousness, give him back the gift of mind, only then may she have a chance at restoring balance between her and Fear and once more they can share bliss in unity in the everywhen, where emotions are benign and overcoming all to find acceptance is commonplace once more.

Define myself? 

Oh, no thank you,

I wish to

kindly,

staunchly,

lovingly,

refuse.

Tell me please

why

should I ever wish to

define myself

and in doing so

contain,

box,

mould and set

myself into

something, someone,

who I move away

from with

each passing moment

(it’s called evolving).

Surely if I say

I am he, she, this or that

you will arrive on my doorstep

with preconceived

ideologies of

who, what, when, why and how

I should be acting.

No thank you.

There are already

too many narrow-minded,

blind to reality,

folk in this world.

I don’t want none

knockin’ on my door late at night,

preachin' at me the many layers,

of how not to live side by side

and how not to be in love with

all in existence.

Oh dear,

not only do

I find myself yawning

at the very concept

of self-definition

purely out of

boredom's sake,

I also quite honestly feel,

it is a mix of

three day old

human faeces

found at the

bottom of an

unkempt port-a-loo

SHIT!

YES! 

It’s all shit!

The faeces no longer needed,

cast out,

expelled,

SHIT remains - -

we move on.

My goal has never been

to see the view from

the bottom of a port-a-loo - 

Stale,

stagnant -

- just like self-definition.

Find me instead,

in the river,

you know the one,

beyond definition.

I shall be there

naked and

floating

formless - 

free - 

come anytime and jump in!

Pop! The bubble exploded - Splat in my face.

A vulgar little girl just delivered 

lashings of cherry flavoured gum, 

at my face, 

it is now, through my beard and 

ginger-specked moustache. 

The wee little skunk of a human ran off … 

Yes ran off, balloon in hand, 

sporting a red tulle skirt, poker dot top, 

and patent leather shoes to boot. 

Finger deep in gooey gum, 

sweetness engaging inners of my nostrils, 

I turn on my heels - run, 

Opposite direction. 

Home, 

to clean my beard, 

change into a red tulle skirt, 

poker dot top and patent leather shoes to boot. 

Damn she looked good! 

Three am in this godless city,

Movement all too familiar,

eyes beckon to me.

I walk on.

City streets mock, engaging me to stay.

These streets are no longer my friends,

the city is a well disguised charlatan.

Allure has been replaced by anguish

I sink deeper in self-chastising shame.

Innocence is no longer in my ownership - goodbye.

What though has it been replaced with? Experience - bah!

It is within experience they say we grow stronger,

I am certain that in loving arms one can grow stronger too.

Where is my home now?

Pitiful, dark, damp room, stagnant air,

Door heavily locked, please, no more intruders.

Sitting alone in my hutch,

Wondering to what depth's I am able to fall.

Drifting within a unique form of my own consciousness,

in this soul invading city.

What life is this that I have executed for myself?

Mistakes have been made, can I turn back,

is it possible for love to return.

Too many errors, pride blocks the way of an outward journey.

I am dirty, too dirty,

This foul stench will never be ridden!

Loathsome city, wretched city, trying to despoil my soul.

Lights that once seduced, now burn my essence with scorn,

Laughing and screaming at my ineptitude to

pull myself back from this transient state,

within the city walls.

Let go the hold, release me,

This offering of bondage I never asked.

Intention to turn one corner, two corners,

maybe three just to bathe in sunshine.

Alas - shame is such a strong burden

for one to feel themselves worthy of bathing in sunshine.

'Such a beautiful girl, ' my grandmother used to say.

The beauty eroded by the city,

into a sunken void of blackened infinity.

Strangers cannot look into my eyes now,

Scared to see themselves in their own reflection perhaps.

My own reflection located in the city's bilge,

murky and ridden with blood sucking insects.

People are cruel, this city even more so,

relentless in its beatings, laughing,

nursing away at my existence.

Dripping cold in my heart is this city,

it has strangled the life from my soul.

Once buoying my dreams,

now gripping each moment into a harsh eternity.

When moments are too enduring reflection creeps in,

What purpose is reflection,

if you feel you have no more aspiration to dream?

Shame, city shame, it may yet be the winner in this game. 

'You have come a long way baby,' 

A pair of glazed grey eyes said.

Noticing her soul in the mirror,

reflection nearly dead.

Kicking and screaming,

wading through the current of life.

Never accepting blind punches,

of any mans strife

Choosing life filled with flowers,

not an option she had.

Cold cracking concrete on offer,

to make the best of the bad.

Downtrodden streets were her home,

hidden comforts lay rare.

Blanketed memories, another life,

shattered, now hanging threadbare.

Home on the streets offering freedom,

liberating past pain,

A trespass through cut glass,

allowing fresh start again.

Men in masses pass though her,

reward of dollar bills.

Allowing 'on the clock' passage,

she was theirs for their thrills.

Shoving their cocks,

in every orifice they found.

Over time pain subsided

drugs numbed her into the ground.

Squinting at life,

in a meth-ridden haze.

Exit not sought,

From the sex riddled maze.

Her soul was worth more,

Damned world and its game.

People cast their eyes downward.

Dirty, stinking whore shame.

Then...

The streets delivered him.

Chancing a glimmer of light.

His smile promised a dream,

Offered new vision, new sight.

He said he loved her, he cared.

He treated her well,

breathing a new life,

dissolving her hell.

Paying for her apartment,

drug habit cast away.

A radiant woman,

smiling inwardly each day.

Yes, he was married,

a consequence not.

Self-proclaimed queen,

this was as good as it got

Alas, she enjoyed freely,

allowing her veil to languish.

His intention to defile,

he introduced her to anguish.

Stuffing sheets in her mouth,

Taping it forcibly shut.

Tieing her legs to the bedposts,

Always ready to fuck!

Whispering he loved her,

yet she deserved pain,

for she was worthless and dirty,

he would fuck her again!

Him, infused with alcohol,

No presence of control,

using knives on her flesh,

slicing through to her soul.

One night he was careless.

He passed out on the bed.

Freeing herself from this life,

she took a knife to his head.

Momentarily slipping,

away from all that is true,

she cut him, she stabbed him,

killing him through.

She took back all that was stolen,

grabbed back her heart,

snatched at her dignity,

time for a fresh start.

She screamed, he was selfish,

silently shedding a tear.

Fault was his, he deserved this,

No longer friends with her fear.

Blood stained hands,

the stench of death,

not once looking back,

she showered and left.

Healing scars on her body,

mending all that he stole,

holding her head high,

she walked away from that hole.

A few weeks passed,

Rapping comes to her door.

Cops came to get her,

A fact she could not ignore.

'Yes' she had killed him,

she confessed when they asked.

'He abused me and used me,'

she watched as they laughed.

Her pleas did not matter,

their plight a foray,

a high profile man murdered,

they aimed to put her away.

'Life!'Said the judge,

compassion was naught,

her life holding no consequence.

This time she couldn't be bought.

Her time there in prison,

Even though, caged like a bird,

freedom sang from within her,

Singing never heard.

'You have come a long way baby'

Worn-out, grey eyes said.

She left her body in the night.

No-one cared she was dead.

I open my heart 

to the distant whispers of love 

that hitchhike through eternity.

Seeking a momentary perch

with souls 

whom welcome light 

I gratefully accept the...

Caress of whispers,

leading me into abandon.

My interior, exterior,

flesh, thought, moments, heartbeats,

feeling, emotion and ideas ... all dishevel.

Kissing the me.

It’s ok to fade,

there’s no need to be.

The whispers clasp my hands,

I drift,

I crumble, 

come apart, 

disband.

Carried along in the

winds of time,

I atomise,

I disunite,

to reunite

with whence I came.

I am an eternal hitch hiker and I offer only

the sweetest whispers of love …..

Edbert encrypts Ethel

Esteeming Ethel’s everywhen

The stemmy effervescence,

When she deemed herself Edbert’s tempter.

Edbert revelled the next expect,

He expects Ethel to X X X

Edbert’s expects sexy sex!!!

Lest, she flew the empty nest.

Ethel screeched when Edbert expelled

The every, every, every, ever - - -

‘EEEEEEEEEE’, she’s entered glee.

She’d be Edbert’s whenever. 

the length 

the strength

the stretch

the fetch

the schlepp

the dreg

the depth

the specks

he spends

the trends

she mends

the ends

she wench

he wrench

the stench

the stent

he’s twelfth

she’s tenth

we tempt

Benny Bent

the bergs

the bells

the beck’s

the blets

he brews

she chews

we crew

we creep

we feck

we feel

we reel

and steel

we wheel

we wheel

we wheel

we wheel